Brides Beware: 5 ‘To-Dos’ Before You Say ‘I Do’

 Brides Beware: 5 ‘To-Dos’ Before You Say ‘I Do’
Follow Jasmine on Twitter @JazBrow


By Jasmine Browley

Last month, we were all inundated with the news of singer Ciara’s engagement to chart topping rapper, Future.

Along with their happy announcement of future (pun intended) wedded bliss, came the rumblings of less than flattering coverage of Future’s baby mama drama.

The rapper has three young children (an 11, 4, and 1 year old) allegedly mothered by three different women but has managed to reconcile his differences with them–so much so, that his wife-to-be was seen on her Instagram account posing it up with two of the young women during her fiancee’s most recent ‘Would You Like a Tour?’ performance, headlined by fellow rapper Drake.  

This, my friends, is how you are supposed to do it.

I have never been one to readily compliment Ciara on anything, but I have to give her the utmost kudos for her stellar maturity. She and her beau get it. Marriage is the ultimate merging of two separate lives, and all that they entail, including the messy exes.

Building a positive relationship with an open line of communication is a must not only between your future life partner, but also between the people that will always be in their life: family, best friends and even messy ‘baby mamas and daddies.’

On that note, here are five things that should be taken care of before jumping the broom:  

1. If there are children involved, get to know them: This should go without saying, but Ill say it anyway, children are supposed to come before anyone else when it comes to a parent. Therefore, it would behoove you to meet the kids, and try to build a relationship before going into a marriage. Usually, one of the tests that  a single parent has for their potential soul mate is whether or not their children will mesh well with them. Act accordingly.

2. If there are children involved, meet their father/mother: The person who helped create your mate’s children will forever be an extension of your life by default. That is just how it is. Take Ciara’s lead and meet them bearing a smile void of malicious intent, and look fabulous while doing it. 

3. Understand your partner’s religion–and determine if you’re equally yoked: When in love, it is a given that compromises will be made about virtually everything–except whom you worship. More often than not, when there are differing religious practices in a marriage, it brings about quite a few difficulties that could have been addressed during the courting stage if the lovebirds were paying attention.  Know what higher being (if any) your partner serves before agreeing to holy matrimony.

4.  Meet the Parents: Granted, meeting the matriarch and/or patriarch of your boo’s life can be a nerve-wrecking experience, but it is necessary. We all have roots, some are strong and well grounded, others are rotten and easily removable. Either way, you have to investigate those roots yourself.

5. Know their financial status and work out a plan on how assets are to be allocated throughout the marriage:  No one wants a scrub; especially one for a spouse. Have a serious talk, no scratch that, have a SERIES of serious talks with your mate about their current financial situation, their plans for the future and their current spending and earning habits. Please do not think that this makes you shallow. It makes you prepared. 


Writer, editor, lover of music and nappy hair, entertainment journalist Jasmine Browley has two blogs ( and, dozens of freelance contributions {including Uptown Magazine}, and is known to keep her ear to the ground, and her pen to paper. Follow Jasmine on Twitter: @JazBrow

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