Single Ladies: Quit Lying; Being Single Wasn’t A Choice

By Shettima “Mocha Chocolate” TV Webb

Have you ever been that woman—the one that is often sized-up and asked, “Why are you single?”

I am sure every single, attractive, got-it-together Alpha woman has been asked that God awful why are you single? question.  I loathe that question.

What straight, single woman does not want a good man in her life? And worse, why are we asked about it?
I mean, why ask me about being single, when I don’t know the reason why I’m single my darn self? 

It seems that when a man is single, he is never asked to explain his relationship status because most single men choose to be single. Men are told to sow their wild oats and not to rush into relationships. 

But a single woman usually doesn’t choose to be single; she can lie all day and say she’s single because she wants to be but the reality is that the man she really wants is on some straight B.S.

Now if you’re a single, straight woman, think about that before you deny it’s true; you know there’s that one man in your life that you wanted and probably imagined growing old with, but somewhere along the way he jacked that up.

Some men tend to jack up a good relationship and then regret it 15 years later, after they’ve married someone else and produced 25 children. (Well, I hope he hasn’t produced that many, but you get my point).

Men you’ve gotta love them, so let me stop criticizing them.

Anytime a woman—especially a Black woman—starts to go there about men she is labeled bitter, angry, hurt, and/or secretly gay, blah, blah, blah.

But I’m just telling the truth about all of this; after all, the truth will set us free right single ladies?

So, why are you single?

Shettima “Mocha Chocolate TV” Webb is a model, entrepreneur and media personality who is committed to capturing everyday people’s stories one interview at a time.  Shettima bravely discusses taboo topics with the goal to help others discover their inner truth and a greater awareness of self.  Holler back at

The blogger’s opinions in this fine blog are her own and may not reflect the official position of The Six Brown Chicks or ChicagoNow.

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