Your job isn't more important because you make more money

One of the perks of waiting tables through high school and college (besides cash in pocket) is the valuable life lessons learned. You learn to never go out in/out of the kitchen empty-handed (or up and down stairs); you learn that how you treat the wait-staff says more about your character than money ever will; and you learn that the “back of the house” is no more important than the “front of the house.”

Sure, you can have a cool atmosphere and fabulous customer service, but if the food sucks your restaurant won’t last long.

Ditto for the reverse.

Incredible food will only take you so far. Even the best “dive” restaurants are downright frightening once the lights are turned on.

Front of the house, back of the house.

cg-postIf you’re part of a couple, you’ve likely had the argument about whose job is more important.

Who cancels their meeting when the sump pump breaks?
Who rearranges their schedule to wait for the AC guy show?

If you have kids, multiply this argument by 100.

If one is a stay at home parent, multiply it by a 1000.

My husband would never recognize our kids pediatrician, even if they sat next to each other at a ball game.
He’s never had to reschedule plans because the babysitter bailed at the last minute…
and he’s rarely ever had to think about what’s for dinner and how the kids are getting to practice.

On the flipside, I never worry if the mortgage was paid on time.
I never wonder who will mow the grass…
and I’ve never had to clean up a nest of baby rabbits the neighborhood cat decapitated.

Front of the house, back of the house.

restaurant-2The kitchen is rarely responsible for ensuring reservations are seated or cashing out checks. And rarely is a front of house manager responsible for planning the menu or cooking entrees.

Sure, one person can run both but life’s a hell of a lot more efficient when both work together.

Will there be occasional imbalances and screw ups? Of course.

But without frequent communication between the front and back, resentment becomes tangible.

Sound familiar?

Unlike a restaurant, though, the lines between front of the house and back of the house at home often blur: two incomes, multiple kids, sick dog.

If you have a party of 50 coming to your restaurant you can’t wait until they arrive to see if you have enough to seat and feed them.

Without a plan there’s more blame and less resolution.

When you have a clearer idea of which tasks fall into FOH and BOH, it’s easier to plan, adjust, and communicate.

Yes, money to pay the bills is damn necessary.


the behind the scenes front of the house is equally so. Otherwise, if the only importance is placed on frying up the bacon, how frightening is the view when the lights finally come up?

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