An Impartial Review of Passover Cake Mixes

My electricity went out this morning due to the little rain shower we are experiencing, yet throughout this winter and the heavy storms my electricity stayed put.  I just read the front of the canister of Chica Seeds I am using and it reads:  “Eat right out of the canister” yet when I read the warning next to the ingredient list on the back of the canister it reads: “Keep out of reach of children.  Consuming this grain without enough liquid may cause choking”.  Twilight Zone or have I suddenly awaken in another dimension?

I’m in a baking mood today, and I bought gluten-free Passover cake mixes for the sweet tooth.   Chocolate Chip Cake, Fudge Marble Cake and Sponge Cake all according to the package Moist & Simple and one step preparation.  I took out the mixer, dumped ever so gently the fudge marble cake mix, ½ cup of oil and it called for 2 eggs, being a vegan I used two Chia eggs (mixed with plenty of liquid so that no one chokes) and I let the cake beat for 4 minutes according to package instructions.   Gross.  It looked like a pile of oily caca.

The nutrition facts stated that 13 slices of cake would come out of the fudge marble cake and I was only able to get 6 average cupcakes.  Each slice of cake must be the size of a fingernail and the author of the nutrition facts was not a Jew.  We Jews cut large portions to begin with and if someone were to ask for seconds, they would receive a larger portion than the first slice.

Since the mixer was out I decided to try another mix and chose the chocolate chip cake.  This one called for 2 extra-large eggs and after the oily chia fiasco I used a drained can of black beans (irony?).   After beating the batter for 4 minutes and only using ¼ cup of oil versus the ½ cup stated on the baking instructions, it looked pretty normal for cake batter.  The oven temperature calls for 335F.  Seriously??  It is either 325F or 350F in the world of normal baking (but then again, who am I to criticize when I don’t even follow the ingredient list) so I used 325F for 30 minutes.  Instructions stated 45 minutes but it would have come out dry and burnt.

I am not even trying the sponge cake as it calls for 6 eggs!

Taste Test:  Not too bad and pretty moist since I removed them from the oven 15 minutes earlier than the box instructions suggested.  Both had interesting after-taste similar to that of Quick Chocolate Milk but overall not too shabby.  Of course, this taster has chiseled in stone that Costco’s Cheese pizza is the best pizza in the whole wide world, hence I would suggest that you try the mixes at your own discretion.
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