Redhead Revolution Makeup Review

Redhead Revolution Makeup Review
Jessica Rabbit

I recently had the opportunity to try products from a new makeup company for redheads. I am always elated to discover new redhead-centric brands because most cosmetics companies don’t adapt their products to our species. Redhead Revolution addresses this desperate area of need. However, Just for Redheads has already been doing just that since like the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was airing or some shit. BUT part of Redhead Revolution’s value proposition that differentiates them is that their products are “made from the highest quality ingredients and contain no parabens, phthalates or synthetic fragrance,” and are “cruelty-free.” I am not sure exactly what these things mean (perhaps no animal testing?) but I know that they are hot topics right now. I know I should care about this stuff (and I do care about animal cruelty) but other than that, I don’t really give a shit. I just want to look damn good, like us redheads are meant to. My personality is fake and some people think my 30DD boobs are fake, so I don’t mind if my makeup is fake too. As long as it doesn’t given me any more g-damned pre-pubescent looking acne. I’m so done with that shit. Like can I stop going through puberty now that I am 27…PUHLEASE?

I’m not really sure why but their URL is a .us instead of a .com. This might just be due to a lack of experience with websites, because when I typed in, it’s an empty site. But alas, perhaps someone else owns this URL and is planning to utilize it when the ginger supremacists finally stage a revolt.

Anywhozizzle, I was lucky enough to try  ‘Love your freckles’ 3-in-1 Tinted Moisturizer, the’Color me happy’ Brow Tint, the ‘The Nymph’ Lip Stain. They also threw in an awesome double-edged Brow Brush to go along with the brow tint:

‘Love your freckles’ 3-in-1 Tinted Moisturizer: At first I wasn’t sure what this was doing when I put in on my skin. Then I realized I couldn’t see what it was doing…because I couldn’t see it! Which means – it blended into my skin incredibly well. Way better than my Beyoncé-backed L’oreal foundation. The tinted moisturizer didn’t feel greasy at all, and it contains both SPF and Aloe. However, the site doesn’t advertise what level of SPF it carries. (Common wisdom says we should all be wearing SPF 15). The copy also explains that the natural ingredients, aside from saving us nightwalkers from the devilish sun, also helps with wrinkles and collagen production. Apparently all that bad crap in makeup hurts your skin. Which makes total sense, because after I started wearing makeup when I was 23 (late bloomer – don’t judge me), my skin got significantly worse. But perhaps that was just a side effect of moving to a city where the air quality is still the worst in the neighborhood where the pigs were slaughtered over 100 years ago during the Industrial Revolution (Pilsen). Or maybe it was yet another result of going through a 2nd puberty in my early ’20s. (I sure as hell didn’t have those double D’s back in high school.) The one thing is that I don’t see much, if any, of a “tint” but wouldn’t us porcelainites looks a little strange with a hint of a tan anyway? Then we might be mistake for…shudder…daywalkers. 4 out of 5 stars (And I’d give it another 1/2 a star if I knew the SPF level was at least 15.)

 ‘Color me happy’ Brow TintHonestly, I probably shouldn’t have asked to try this because I have no idea why the fuck people wear brow tint. My friend B. went to a free “how-to-put-makeup-on” sesh (I hate myself for writing “sesh” instead of “session”) with her other friend who’s a bit more…shall we say…high-maintenance? B. never wears makeup, and she looks beautiful without it. So B. suffered through the sesh … ahem …session, and her friend tells her, “Oh you have to make your eyebrows look like that every time you leave the house!” B. was understandably offended, and when she showed me a picture of said eyebrows, all I could think of was Burt from Sesame Street. Redhead Revolution’s brow tint did not, thankfully, make me look like Burt from Sesame Street. It was a good shade darker but not so dark that it looked unnatural. Read: you could actually tell I had eyebrows. Still, I don’t really know how to use brow tint, and I felt it looked strange. But maybe that’s my lack of experience in wearing brow tint. And maybe normal people (non-mutant) product lines don’t offer “1 shade darker than non-existent” brow tint colors. 3 1/2 out of 5 stars

‘The Nymph’ Lip Stain: I was most excited to try this lip stain, and I was most disappointed by it. I love the name, and when I put the color on, it reminded me of what my lips might look like if I were part of the Cullen clan in Twilight. Perhaps that is simply because I already have the coloring of a vampire, but that’s besides the point. My main issue with the stain was that I swiped it 5 times before I started to see much of a difference in coloring. Now I’ve also had a co-worker ask me why I never wear lipstick when I was wearing lipstick, so perhaps my lips just require heavy-duty coloration. The stain also didn’t stay on through a meal, despite its promise to last all day. Another issue I have, not with this stain, but with the collection in general, is that they only offer glosses and stains but no lipsticks. Please correct me if I am wrong, but I thought lip gloss meant for 12-year-olds as a gateway drug to lipstick. Also, I am also really into these lipstick crayons that are stains and balms at the same time, and I’d really love to see more of these from companies like Redhead Revolution. But perhaps it’s hard to make something that awesome without putting horrible chemicals in it. 3 out of 5 stars

The other really, really big thing I see wrong with Redhead Revolution that I see right with Just for Redheads is their mascara selection. Redhead Revolution only offers two mascaras, and both are for daywalkers. In other words, they are dark and would look unnatural on those of us with eyelashes so invisible we’re occasionally mistaken for cancer patients when we’re wearing hats. Just for Redheads makes mascara that actually matches our hair color, in shades such as GingerRed. However, Redhead Revolution’s products seem to be high quality, which I can’t say for Just for Redheads, and the best part is that they’re Chicago-based. Plus I love the idea of products that help skin in addition to temporarily making it look better…and I am sure those of you who know wth parabens are are happy to see Redhead Revolution avoids them. Redhead Revolution is a bit on the more expensive side but not nearly as expensive as what I get in my BirchBox each month (damn my brother for getting a subscription, and therefore an addiction, to high-end products!).

Have you tried Redhead Revolution products? What do you think? What would you like to see in makeup for redheads?

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    The Ginger Phile has had the unfortunate disposition of being a ginger since birth. She has tried various medications to cure her gingervitis, including therapies such as tantrum-throwing. Her efforts have been to no avail. Instead, she is trying to write it out, via this blog. Unfortunately, she doesn't think it will bear a soul for her. The Ginger Phile is from the exotic land of Wisconsin, where she had daily inner turmoil over whether she was a ginger or a daywalker. So far, three of three votes say daywalker. She begs to differ, as someone recently told her they would want to be with her if they were biking at night because she is so pale.

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