A Letter to Myself When I’m Depressed

letter

Dear Bridget,

It’s feeling ok, depression managed Bridget.

I know that you’re in a really dark place right now and you feel like you can’t turn to anyone. I know that you feel like everyone hates you and that you hate yourself. But you need to gather every bit of energy that you can muster and tell yourself that it’ll be ok and that people love you.

Take a deep breath and then another. Listen to your breathing. Try a breathing exercise: inhale for four seconds, hold your breath for seven seconds, and exhale for eight seconds. There you go, you’re starting to calm down now.

I know that you’re feeling so low that you might want to drink to cope. Please do not do that. Drinking will not make you feel better. You know from past experience that it will only make you feel worse and may even lead you to self-harm.

I know that you feel really alone right now, like no one understands you, but drinking is not the solution. Alcohol is a depressant. If you choose to drink right now, then you will most likely want to hurt yourself.

If you’re feeling this depressed, then you need to talk to someone. Be honest about how you’re feeling. Also, avoid Facebook when you’re feeling like this. All of the wedding and baby pictures will not make you feel better.

If you don’t feel like talking to anyone right now, then trust me: people love you. You have family and friends who care about you and your wellbeing. They’ll be so happy if you go to them before choosing to drink or self-harm. Don’t be embarrassed to ask for help.

You’re probably laying on the couch in the dark right now. I understand how hard it is to get off the couch when you’re feeling this way. It seems almost impossible. But try going for a walk. Even a short walk around the block could make you feel better. You still have plenty of Pokémon to catch. #gottacatchemall

If you’re not in the mood to think about your family and friends, then think about your cats. Although they struggle and whine when you hold them, they still love you. Little Sox really loves you when you feed him. Why don’t you give him a treat right now, so you can feel that love? He may be willing to cuddle after that treat.

If the cats aren’t being a helpful distraction, then you should watch a Parks and Rec blooper reel, look at cute pictures of interspecies friendships, or peruse Beyonce’s Instagram.

Lastly, write about how you’re feeling. Writing is cathartic for you. Even if it’s nonsensical stream of consciousness, you’ll feel better after you spill your feelings in a journal. Challenge yourself to write a haiku about depression. Here’s a haiku for you:

You are pretty great
You are loved by so many
Think like Leslie Knope

I hope you’re smiling now or at least feeling calmer. Remember to challenge your negative thoughts. Don’t feel guilty about telling yourself that you’re a good person who deserves to live, who deserves a future, who deserves to be happy.

Love,

Bridget

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