The Heart ~ When Yours Doesn't Grow Up

This is a world of daily crime. Crimes of war, of theft, of finance and of violence. But the crimes of the heart hold a special place in the hierarchy. These include breaking hearts, cheating hearts, having your heart broken. Plus one more — growing up with a heart that hasn’t fully grown up.

It’s a condition which can be called being (1) childish, or (2) child-like. Big big difference.

(1) On the matter of being ‘childish,’ the male of the species appears to be a hands-down winner. Some current childish examples hurry to mind, like men’s hairlines. Women have the reputation for being fixated on their hair, but lately men are passing them up. Currently millions of us seem obsessed with growing that fashionable half-beard look…full-beard look…in the Middle East $7000 transplants to give the elegant mustache look…in many American cities, the shaved-head look….plus the ever-popular ever-slipping topee look. If a woman’s hair is still “her crowning glory,” what can we say about today’s childish male obsessions with what they once simply took for granted?

(2) On the matter remaining ‘child-like,’ the female of the species comes in a clear first. Child-like as in finding it easy to weep…to hug….to break out into song….to fantasize… to day dream. These results come from various social science studies in the University of Kansas where male researchers seemed to feel the need to quantify the female emotional landscape. Whereas the male instinct to be ‘strong and silent’ remains long after the frontier days when it was the acceptable modus operandi, the female instinct to be ‘concerned, caring and empathic’ appears to remain firmly in place.

The research didn’t pose this question, but may I? Why do hundred of war-time medical records report the last-words-of-dying-soldiers is almost always “Mother.” Not the male role-models in their life like brother, coach, sergeant, or even father. Is it possible in the mostly-male-dominated history of humanity that we’ve had the wrong gender in power? The childish boy-warriors among us rather than the child-like tender hearts?

In the final measure, the toughest of men are still drawn to the tenderest of women. Now why should that be a surprise…

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