Tag: mr. swirley

A Valentine's Day story: I gave a guy the wrong number and then we got married

Today marks the fourteen-year and 364 day anniversary of poor Mr. Swirley enduring my rendition of John Mellencamp’s “Jack & Diane”. No wonder his ears routinely bleed. I met Old Man Swirley in the fall of 2000. After chatting at a party where he broke a couch, I decided the most subtle thing I could... Read more »

That time I accidently took my husband to a strip club

Back when I lived in DC,  I shopped at Ann Taylor and wore pearls. I mean, they really should have a bouncer checking IDs at that store and boot anyone under 45 for the good of humanity (and fashion). Conservative clothing aside, I liked to have fun. Some dancing at Chief Ike’s “club” with “Hillbillies”... Read more »

A baby who LOVES Katy Perry and 8 other Internet videos that will make your head explode

A baby who LOVES Katy Perry and 8 other Internet videos that will make your head explode
The world can be a rough place for us working folks.  This mere fact is exactly why the Internet is awesome. Singing babies, singing animals, saucy comedians, tear jerkers – the Interwebs has something for everyone who needs a little pick me up.. Below are nine of my fave videos – share a link to... Read more »

Operation Lazyass: I always go the extra mile to avoid doing things

I’ll  admit it: I’m a lazyass. I mean, when it counts I’ll get ‘er done, but if I am out of coffee filters (for a week), paper towels always trump a trip to the grocery store.I can’t recall if I have always been like this. Or, more likely, I am too lazy to actually sit... Read more »

Six Amazing Valentine's Day Gifts My Husband Can Get Me This Year, But Won't

A few days ago I spied a cookbook gifted to me by my mother-in-law titled, “How to Make Love & Dinner at the Same Time.” Eek. Susie Q getting saucy! I ended up setting it on fire, so I obviously didn’t follow the rule of not heating up the kitchen.  But it did get me... Read more »

How to Kill Romance: Pose With Your Mom's Used Lingerie

Do you know what the most unromantic gift to give to your wife on your second, seventh anniversary (story to follow)? Gravel. OK, not really. I mean, I really didn’t get the gravel. But I also forgot our anniversary for the second time this year. Yes, we have two anniversaries because we decided to get... Read more »

Domestic Wars: Backyard Bargaining

There’s a war afoot in the Swirley household. Now that spring has arrived, we have to decide what to do with our backyard. I, being the loving mother who would like to keep her child occupied while she gardens, reads, lazes about, am lobbying for the purchase of a used slide for EK. Mr. Swirley,... Read more »

David Bowie and my husband's love of the denim tuxedo

David Bowie. While the catalyst for my years- long devotion was the film, Labyrinth (1986), I celebrated his entire collection. Let's Dance? Right into your bedroom, Dave. 

Oh, and his crotch has a Facebook fan page.
I was recently reminded of my unbridled love for Dave Grohl. I mean, it’s impossible to forget his incredible dreaminess, but now that he has kids (apparently the fact that I have a family is irrelevant) I pretty much gave up all hope that he would see me at a concert and decide that he... Read more »

New Parent Guilt List: Part II - When Guilt Turns to Apathy

A few weeks ago I publicly outed myself as the jackass I really am. Generally speaking, I like to ignore my parenting ineptitude…except for last week when I let my kid run around Target screaming my name (MY FULL NAME) while I perused the shelves for nothing in particular. Or when I lost him at... Read more »

Random thoughts: Overboard, nerd-models, DIY projects and ketchup

Big news  folks, big news. Last week I received a Facebook message from one Greg Proffit (screen name from Overboard, obviously) basically saying: “I saw your post. I am sort of OK with it. Do I have to hire security for my wedding? I am surprised I haven’t unfriended you.” I KNOW! I KNOW! I... Read more »
  • Advertisement:
  • Advertisement:
  • ChicagoNow is full of win

    Welcome to ChicagoNow.

    Meet our bloggers,
    post comments, or
    pitch your blog idea.

  • Meet The Blogger

    Annie Swingen

    Chicago-based hyperbole enthusiast. Mom to a kid and sometimes my mom. Overboard (1987) obsessed weirdo. I like the funnies in life.

  • Recent posts

  • Monthly Archives

  • Tags

  • Latest on ChicagoNow

  • Advertisement: