I went high, and the world went so very low: a tale about fraud

I’ve been a judgmental bitch lately, or, at the very least, I’ve felt that way. It’s hard not to pass judgement on others when everyone is just letting his or her crazy all out there online. This election has brought out the worst in folks, and I’m lumped into the mix.

I told myself to give it a break, and to practice what I preach to the boys. I told myself that I HAVE to believe that there is good and love in the world, otherwise I’m just feeding them lies. I told myself that I believed that good would win out over evil.

But, goddamn it, I’m not so sure. It seems we live in a world full of low, and while I’ve been very lucky (and really LUCK seems to be all there is to it) others around me haven’t. Just recently someone near and dear to my family fell victim to a scam, and lost EVERYTHING because we live in a world where bad preys on good. We live in a world where the elderly are targeted instead of revered. Yes, this individual was a victim of the classic scam–“XYZ is in trouble. They need money right away. I can bring it to them.” In the blink of an eye, a life savings is wiped away, all because an individual thought he/she was doing good. It seems a big, open, giving heart will do little more than make you a target.

Moreover, a big heart isn’t the only target out there. Race, gender, sexual identity, religion, age, social economic status, living situation, political affiliation, etc will make you a target to others. The very essence of you–the qualities that make you who you are–can also make you a target.

I’m tired, so tired of feeling the awfulness of this world. I’m sitting over here wondering about Halloween Lularoe prints and my Instagram followers on the daily because I LITERALLY CANNOT PROCESS THE ENORMITY of everything around me. I attend to the trivial because I feel powerless against the important. My very wise parents once told me that I’d long for my teen years again because life was less complicated. I thought they were referring to responsibility alone. While I’m sure that was part of it, responsibility isn’t the only thing that makes being an adult difficult. It’s the world around me that is all making it so fucking hard. And, I have no idea what to do in a world like this.

My intent isn’t to ruin your day with a heavy post. And, I know little can be offered here to fix the situations (though, I’ll never argue that light and love, given anyway possible isn’t a good thing and appreciated). We’ve all got a lot on our plate, and the world can’t be saved overnight. Still, I wonder how to keep my head up, or at least up enough to gasp for air. May your flailing be more productive than mine today, and may the low steer clear of you and your family.
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