I'm A Shlimazel When It Comes To My Car


Those of you who read my blog on a regular basis, and you know who you are, so I thank you for that, might remember from my blog post “Your Guide to 20 Great Yiddish Words,” that a shlimazel is someone with bad luck. When it comes to my car, I really do have bad luck. I am driving a tan 1999 Ford Escort Wagon, which I bought in 2003 and it is still going strong. The all important question when I was car shopping was “will my massage table fit easily into this car?” When I was test driving it, I stopped at my apartment, got my table, eased it into the back as if I were placing a document into a manila folder and voila, it fit like a glove. That car was made to carry that table! So, I bought it. Little did I know that it would still be going almost 12 years later.

We bought our very first house in W. Rogers Park in 2010 so that we would be 6 blocks away from our son’s school. In retrospect, that was a really great move. Did you see what I did there? My son hates to get up in the morning, so getting him to school is a big stressor for my husband and me. Many a morning, I end up driving him to school which is no big deal when it is only 6 blocks away.

Little did I know that the drivers in my neighborhood would be that terrible. When my insurance rates went up 30% when we moved from Lakeview, that should have been a warning. In the 4 years that I have lived here, my car has been hit while parked 4 times; twice in front of my house whereby my bumper was cracked and then one month later, my very expensive power mirror got ripped off completely. It was sideswiped across the street and the worst was when it was parked a few blocks away when it was technically totaled. I cried on the phone with the insurance adjuster since it happened on Christmas eve and they ultimately decided to pay to restore it to its original beauty.


That all sucked, but the very worst luck I had with my car was the day I got a $25 ticket for parking in front of my house, facing the wrong direction. Did you even know that was a parking violation? I sure didn’t. The crappy part about it was that I was parked for literally 5 minutes, waiting for my son, so that I could get him to his camp field trip in time. The camp policy was such that if he arrived after the buses left, he was not allowed to go on the field trip, even if I brought him. I just could not believe my luck. I couldn’t have been inside more than 2 or 3 minutes and I come out to find a ticket on the driver’s side window.


The thing is that since that happened I have seen dozens of parked cars, facing the wrong direction and not a single fucking one of them has ever gotten a ticket. In fact, the day I got my ticket, my neighbor was parked facing the wrong direction for over 3 hours. Never got a fucking ticket. How do I know? Because I kept checking to see when the ticket would appear. I am still bitter about it, well, just a little bit…grudge holding is not healthy! I guess I would feel better if I saw just one other ticketed car.

If you enjoy my rantings and ravings and don’t want to miss a single new post, please sign up for a subscription. It’s really easy. Here’s how…
Type your email address in the box and click the “create subscription” button. My list is completely spam free, and you can opt out at any time.

Be sure to LIKE my Facebook Fan Page and follow me on Twitter

Leave a comment