By Amir, guest columnist
Making love is spiritual and it forms a bond between two people that lingers long after the climax. Sex is a physical act, for some, it is just an exercise. If you’re juggling multiple women, no matter what you do in bed, you’re just having sex with them, because you’re playing games. A man makes a decision; he chooses the person he wants to be with, and she has his full attention.
Thus, making love is a grown man’s pleasure.
Making love to a Black woman begins long before you enter the bedroom. There’s a science to this. Read what I’ve learned from my wife.
- Ask her what she wants from you before you take things to the next level. Here’s why making love is a grown man’s game; if a woman wants a commitment and you’re not ready for that, move on. (There are plenty of females out there who are willing to play around.) Don’t hang around and lie to a woman just to “get it.” In the end, she’ll hate you and you’ll hate yourself.
- Earn her trust. What does earning her trust mean? It means that before you enter her bed, demonstrate that you’re reliable. Keep your word to her. If you fuck up, apologize and atone to restore the trust. If your woman trusts you, she will be uninhibited in bed. Guaranteed.
- Talk to her often. If you want sex, send a text. If you want to make love to a Black woman, call her. Pick up the phone and ask, “How was your day?” Your follow-up question should be: “How can I make your day brighter?” If she says flowers will make her day brighter, send them. If she says just a few hours of peace will make her day brighter, do something to take a load off her plate. Your gesture must be genuine; give of yourself and don’t expect anything in return. This will make her fall in love with you. A woman who is in love with you will be uninhibited in bed. Guaranteed.
- Curb your tongue. Everyday won’t be filled with butterflies and rainbows. There will be conflict. No matter your rough patch, however, you must never, ever, call a Black woman a degrading name. Do you know how many times a Black woman hears “bitch, ho, slut, thot,” etc., in popular media? Can you imagine how hurtful these words would be for her to hear from a person she loves? Such verbal abuse can kill the soul of a woman. Your Black woman will gradually distrust you, and your lovemaking sessions will eventually morph into passionless sex. Guaranteed.
- Be prepared to please your Black woman. You will have to learn what she likes. Don’t bring another woman’s favorite moves into her bedroom. Taking the time to learn her erogenous zones will prompt her to do the same.
At this stage, your minds, bodies and souls will bond in the bedroom and beyond. Making love when you’re in love is the best thing ever.
Follow Amir and other men who believe in positive relationships in The Goodfellazs relationship group.
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