Why You Should NEVER Give Your Ex Another Shot
By Jean Usen
I know you’re not going to like what I have to say, sis. I can see beads of sweat forming on your brow and the cuss words dripping from your lips. Before you slide out of your sandals and pop off your clip-ons, let me earn your angst:
I’m saying it: he’s gone and he ain’t coming back.
You’re already thinking of six different ways to tell me to mind my own business, but let’s proceed.
Remember when you warned him about how much he would miss you?
Girl, he was happy as a lark to watch you leave! Nothing has changed but you. You miss him. You’re lonely. You’re horny. You’ve convinced yourself that the kids want their daddy and he is worth your long-term misery. He’s not—and you are only holding out because you’re afraid that someone else will come along and scoop him. You’re a queen. If you can’t make that pauper a prince, Chi Chi the Chicken Head can’t either.
You may be ready to Love and Hip Hop your way out of this most recent bout of wanton foolishness, but I have seen your Captain Kirk, he’s not here to save you, he’s here to maim you. When he looks at you, he sees a mother that didn’t love him enough. He can’t face her, so he faces you. The heat you see in his eyes is not lust for another woman or disgust for your extra pounds. That man hates you for loving him because he can’t love himself. He hates you because he hates life and love itself.
You are kissing a frog and he will never be a prince.
Often we don’t mean to have second conversations, catch feelings or settle down with Mr. Random. But somehow, it happens. We wake up two years later next to the cab driver with the mediocre sex and vulgar mouth.
You are miserable; wrap your whole mind around that. It is your funk so wear it; sit in it until you cannot stand the stench, if you must. Then run, girl, RUN! Get away and stay away. Get a life, get a job, hell, get a hobby. Boo, date yourself and get over him fast!
Don’t hold up the wall for some clown who has seen your soul and still treats you like dirt. Your ex is gone and while you may not have forgotten him, I’m here to tell you that it is time you did.
The new page in your next chapter of life demands it.
Jean Usen is the Creative Director for Art of Harcourt and Global Communications Director for One Sista to Anotha (itlradio.com) and ChronoSpark Public Relations, a firm that seeks to encounter art and stretch communication, music and literature appreciation in digital spaces. Twitter: @ChronoSparkPR
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Filed under: Attraction, Breakups, Change, dating, Dating nightmares, Family, Girl Power, Girl Talk, Girl, He Tricked My Ass!, Girlfriends, Relationships, Self worth, Sex, Sex with the Ex, SHACKING UP, Shady, Single Women, Six Brown Chicks Correspondents