An Open Letter: Un-Happy Father's Day

Un-Happy Father’s Day

By A Comeaux

You were a young, ambitious, cocky guy with a beautiful smile.

You had a presence about you that lit up a room, leaving everyone to wonder, ‘who’s that?’ Being a leader was like breathing. Natural, effortless and always collected, you were the cool to my fire.

Loving you gave me confidence as if no other man on this earth even mattered.

We fell in love fast and hard with the world watching what they’d soon learn was a train wreck; there were casualties and bloodshed abound.

When you add egos with incredible sex, divided by broken hearts, and wounded expectations, the obvious sum is a whirlwind.

I loved you precociously. At two months pregnant, I found out you were selfish and abusive, deceitful and manipulating, so I left you.

 I didn’t want our child to witness and mimic the person you’d become.

When you moved across the country I was relieved. I was so in love with our son I didn’t even miss you. Until I heard you married ‘her’. You had a child with her and *gasp… You were providing for her 2-3 kids. You saved her. THAT made my blood boil.

You gave her everything you told me you were too broken to give me.

It’s wonderful you took them all on a family vacation, but you’ve yet to take my Sun to the zoo, ball game, barbershop or school play. He needs you. He was here before them and regardless of our discrepancies why make him suffer?

You own the company that pays you and you dress better than most men on television! Yet it’s always a ‘bad time’ when our son needs you. The convenience of your scapegoat is you telling me to tell my daddy since I love him so much! You’re a coward.

This open letter is more attention than I’ve given you in more than 7 years. Enjoy. Your absence is my motivation. 

He won’t go without ANYTHING in my bloodlines power to provide. It’s because of your leaving that I grew into the woman I am. Money can’t replace you but he’s well taken care of and loved. I learned fatherless boys often become absent fathers.

I feel sorry for you missing out on such an awesome child! He needs you to teach him to be a man. I can’t teach him that. I can never fill the shoes you left by the door. Every time I have to decide which bill to pay and what’ll have to wait, or what outfit I can buy and what has to be placed on layaway, I think of her diamond ring and the wedding you paid for. That burns.

 I work twice as hard at home and in the world because your absence is wider than the span of my reach.

And yet I manage to flip you the bird.

Open letter, closed chapter.

A Comeaux

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