For Men Only: How to Get Lucky on V-Day (A Guide by Gina B.)


Six Brown Chicks’s Gina B. gives tips to make V-Day a win-win for reluctant men everywhere. Photo: Michal Marcol.

I like Valentine’s Day when I’m in a relationship.  Because, let’s face it . . . I like any occasion that gives me a license to eat chocolate, shop for perverted cards, and celebrate love – or at minimum really intense like. 


Now . . . when it comes to men, I don’t know any that like Valentine’s Day.   


Why would they?  What do they care about truffles and cutesy boxer shorts with embroidered teddy bears?


Most of them feel anxiety on January 2nd, the minute the stores switch from holiday décor to a regurgitation of red.  Either they’re not serious about the ones they’re with, they’re clueless about what to do, or they fold their arms tightly in protest, obstinately refusing to even acknowledge that February 14th has any significance apart from the St. Valentine’s Day Massacre. 


Guys, blatant refusal to participate in Valentine’s Day is perfectly acceptable . .. if you’re single.   If you have a special person in your life, believe me when I tell you that she has Valentine’s Day expectations, or at least preferences. 


Whether or not she plays it cool and says that she doesn’t care, she will scowl when the woman in the adjacent office receives a bouquet of flowers, box of candy, or even a cheesy box of those chalky pastel hearts that have silly sentiments on them.



Photo: Graur Codrin



Most of us don’t have expectations of original sonnets or marriage proposals.  The earth doesn’t have to move; you don’t have to stage a parade or go to Jared.  We just want to know you’re thinking of us. That’s all.


The smart man has learned to tolerate Valentine’s Day.  Even if he hates it, he knows that it’s important to his significant other and he wants to make her happy.  This man also knows that the V-Day situation can be a win-win.  A small gesture can yield great rewards later that evening. 


Guys, here are a few guidelines that will ensure a happy

Valentine’s Day for both of you.



1. Know your woman.  Is she allergic to flowers?  Does chocolate give her hives?  Understand those things about her and gift accordingly.


2.  At minimum, get a cute card.  If you’re in a new not-so-serious relationship, select something light-hearted that will make her laugh.   For the best selection, buy the card before February 14th.   


3. If you plan to have dinner, make a reservation.  Don’t think you’re just going to be able to “drop in” somewhere on Valentine’s Day.  You will piss off your date and dramatically decrease your chances of getting lucky.


4. Skip the teddy bears and stuffed animals.  In theory, they’re cute for only about five minutes.  We never know what to do with them. 


5. Don’t go overboard with chocolate.  As much as I love chocolate, a 100-piece box would do nothing but give me thigh anxiety.  A 20-piece box or even a 5-10 piece box would suffice.  Plan to share it with us!  


6. Whatever you do, do it from the heart and with a sincere interest in making it a fun day.  Don’t remind her of how much you hate the day and what it stands for. 


Guys, you will thank me later.

Ladies, may your sweetness be his weakness!



Gina B.  





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  • Thanks Gina,
    I will forward these suggestions to my male friends. I want Jared:) Seriously, it's the thought that counts so a card, roses or chocolate will suffice.

  • In reply to shoyabowman:

    I'll put your garbage out for pick-up; you don't need mess in your life, so metaphorically I remove all that stinks up our environment and causes confusion and disorder. I stand, black woman, against that which offends you with fervor. Know my thoughts in my gesture; these thoughts add up. My thoughts matter; these thoughts count. Sufficient? RealDude inquires.

  • In reply to shoyabowman:

    I hear you Real Dude...I am a Real Woman and I will enjoy V-Day and all of the other days of the year as well!

  • Totally cute Gina!

  • Thanks for reading! :-)

  • In reply to gpbarge:

    Thanks for saying! RealDude quips.

  • Gina this hit the spot! Quick, simple and to the point. I hope that the men will love it as I do!

  • Well written, well said! Well I'm single so for me, no red! Good pointers, ever so true!!
    Hope the fellas take note!

  • Well, I buy the gift for V-Day, B.O.B. gets a spanking new package of batteries! =0)

  • Gina B, I have a question. What if I have LOTS of swagger? Do I still need to do the above things?

  • In reply to beansouptimes:

    Toure, even those with swagger must participate. In fact, if you have as much swagger as you profess, I challenge you to make it THE most spectacular day. :-)

  • I hear you Gina. I think from my own perspective, I recognize how women view the day; it's all about recognition and acknowledging the fact that that woman is special. Men abhor V-day for its commercialism; vendors cannot not force me to do something for you for the sake of filling their pockets. Men would prefer to spend all they have on a woman if and when the man chooses to, not by the whim of another. We do not like being told what to do unless we are role playing, and even then don't go too far. We don't like our boss at work, what makes you think we want a boss at home, too??? However, I'm all for making my woman smile, at almost any reasonable amount. I also know that gifts from the heart don't always mean succumbing to the hype of materialism. Nice romantic gestures within your character that create a reminiscent feeling to why she fell in love in the first place can really go the distance if it is REAL. I know that when she is happy, she is beautiful to be around and the whole world knows it. Happy Valentine's Day to all the ladies everywhere! Know that you are special and loved no matter what you receive or do not receive. Put happy in your heart and let it out to pollinate all around you. Inhale, exhale; be phenomenal. RealDude loves. RealDude speaks. RealWoman, you hear me?

  • In reply to MichaelLBell:

    Thanks RealDude!! :-)

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