Tag: Bachelor

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 3 "Balls are Flying at Your Face"

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 3 "Balls are Flying at Your Face"
Yea, we’re back. I wish I could say that excitedly, but let’s be real, I dropped the ball here. I missed the first two episodes of Bachelor Ben 2016. I became too preoccupied with these silly little endeavors called “New Years Resolutions.” But I finally realized focusing on dumb crap like my physical fitness, continuing... Read more »

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 6 "I'm Going to Kick Her Ass"

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 6 "I'm Going to Kick Her Ass"
The Apology First let me start by apologizing for this delay. I’ve been a bad blogger. You start off blogging about this show, then people want to watch it with you, then you become the dude with Bachelor viewing parties every Monday, then you can’t get people out of your place in time for you to write... Read more »

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 4 "You're More than Welcome to Go Home"

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 4 "You're More than Welcome to Go Home"
So this week’s going to be a little different. At least according to Chris Harrison, “This week’s going to be a little different.” So predictable, Chris. Somebody, please invent a Chris Harrison voice-box, pull-string doll already. Farmer Chris’ three farmer sisters will be here to help him pick his farmer wife. Did I mention… “farmer”?... Read more »
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The Bachelor Recap: Episode 3 "Amazing"

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 3 "Amazing"
Week 3 is where we typically start seeing some surprises. Sometimes it’s a surprise, competitive twist in a group date. Maybe it’s the classic surprise concert from some band that typically only regulars in the band’s hometown watering hole have ever heard of. So what surprise are we in for this season? Jimmy Kimmel? Yep,... Read more »

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 2 "You have to find your own truth"

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 2 "You have to find your own truth"
Allow me to apologize. I’m sorry I was absent last Tuesday from this recap. I tried my best to sequester myself with Farmer Chris and The Bachelor in front of the bedroom TV. I really tried to drown out the hooplah and hysteria of the first ever BCS Playoff Championship. But, I failed. I caved and... Read more »

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 1 "Wow, Hi"

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 1 "Wow, Hi"
Well tonight was the night, ladies and gentlemen! Now I’m sure most of you were popping your champagne to bring in the New Year and new you! Or some of you were waiting anxiously for Santa to come down the chimney and reward you for being such a good boy or girl. But for most... Read more »
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Bachelor Recap: Finale "I Like You A LOT a Lot"

Bachelor Recap: Finale "I Like You A LOT a Lot"
There’s been a lot of championships I’ve gotten hyped for, but at the end of the day, the Lombardi trophy or the Larry O’Brien trophy are merely just hunks of metal. The Bachelor is meant to award the heart. But first, such a big event calls for a studio audience, including some familiar faces: scorned rose-less... Read more »

Bachelor Recap: Episode 9 "You Barely Made It"

Bachelor Recap: Episode 9 "You Barely Made It"
Consider Episodes 1 through 8 the foreplay. The Bachelor, unlike most of contemporary society, kept us waiting. Some would call those type of standards old fashioned. They’d say the dates, the courtship, and the long, careful process to get to know one another are all just hindrances to the inevitable end game. But that’s just... Read more »

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 8

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 8
We’ve traveled around the world together. We danced pop in Korea, kissed under waterfalls at the Shire, and maybe or maybe not got a little too close and coitusy in the warm oceans of Vietnam. But now, it’s time for the girls to put away the luggage and the Ambien, forget about traveling and get... Read more »
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The Bachelor Recap: Episode 7

The Bachelor Recap: Episode 7
Happy belated Valentine’s Day everybody! If any of you ladies are disappointed after your valentine gave you a coupon book during your date to the Pizza Hut buffet, sit back and grow angry at the indignity of it all as Juan Pablo takes his remaining ladies to the picturesque scenes of his hometown. They’re partying... Read more »