So, let me say that when I refer to “The end of The Streak”, I’m not talking about the Undertaker for you wrestling fans. If you have no idea what that refers to, I’m sorry…you’ve missed out. Moving on…
…I’m talking about the multi-year streak of me not falling on winter ice here in our fabulous town. It has been 5+ years since I’ve been the victim of the countless falls and tumbles we see people take every winter.
I’ve seen some extremely comical ones…and not so comical ones. Women in heels taking a ride always brings on my “Oh no!” face…
I’m usually thinking “Oh no…she’s gonna break something. Why are you wearing heels in this weather???”
Or you see the downright gruesome, when some poor schlub goes heels over ass and looks like a Picasso as he goes up, only to come crashing down in a hot pile of humanity.
And I’ve been very fortunate to have avoided all of that for quite a few years. Until this past Tuesday.
So the weather took a turn, resulting in rain, which froze into ice (resulting in quite a pretty and serene glaze on my car that morning), coupled with a little bit of snow.
I headed to work, and parked in a parking lot. As I pulled into the lot, I noticed that it was unusually slick, but it didn’t really give rise to any concern.
Now, at this point, I truly think my downfall was getting out of my car while holding my Caramel Macchiato from Dunkin Donuts. If I hadn’t had the drink in my hand, perhaps I could have saved myself. Then again, maybe not.
So, I open my door, and extend my left leg out of the car. I suppose it’s also important to mention that I was wearing a pair of Tony Hawk Skater Shoes.
They have a rather smooth bottom. Perhaps that was my undoing.
So, as I shifted my weight onto that leg…I noticed there was no grip…and my leg was sliding. with my macchiato in my right hand, there was no way to grip the steering wheel….my left hand reached in vain along the side of the car. At that moment, I knew there was only one thing to do….
…SAVE THE CARAMEL MACCHIATO!!!!
So, I went with the fall, it was rather slow, as my butt seemed to just slide off the seat. My left thigh touched the ground first, as my foot continued to slide. It was then joined by my right knee, and I went belly down, sitting my coffee cup on the ground.
When you’re fighting a losing battle, I suppose you have to look for small victories. I saved my drink…my tasty, over-priced drink. I slowly picked myself up off the cold, wet ground. I pulled my bags out of the car, and lastly, I picked up my caramel macchiato, and I successfully penguin walked off of the ice and to the sidewalk.
I wasn’t hurt, there was only 1 witness, who probably wouldn’t have noticed at all if I hadn’t loudly exclaimed “Aww Shit!” mid-journey. All things considered, it wasn’t a big deal. However, I no longer hold my streak, and that, is maddening.