I wish I had known that commitments are taken lightly by some

Tonight is blogapalooza night, the night where we get a topic and an hour to write a post about it. Here is tonight’s topic:

“Write about something you know now that you wish you knew then.”

This is an interesting topic because I was just pondering how seriously I take a commitment and how often I am surprised that others do not. In fact, I am very hesitant sometimes to join a group because I take it seriously. I don’t want to make a promise I cannot keep.

I wish I had known that commitments are taken lightly by some. Really lightly in fact! And I didn’t get this for a long time.

I am sure I got this from my parents. My dad never joined anything that he didn’t become president of that organization. My mother would never let us break a date because we got a better offer.

In their opinion, if you make a promise you keep it. When my mother was in her final months of life we even talked about it. I was telling her that I loved her and what a great Mom she had been.

She looked at me and explained that she took her job as wife and mother seriously, very seriously. She was on duty every single day. In fact when she slipped into a coma, she would make the motions of preparing a meal.

That was my example in life and I have held it close to me. That seriousness makes me hesitate to say yes. I want to KNOW that I can follow through.

When I am invited somewhere and I say yes, I hate canceling. It surprises me when others are not the same. I have shown up sick, with headaches or colds but by golly, I am there!

Over the years, I have learned that for some people saying, YES! I will be there = That sounds like fun, I hope I make it. I think I take commitments too seriously but lately, if people have shown me they don’t with me, I reciprocate.

then re 1Tomorrow my guild is having an extra block swap. If you didn’t have extras, you could make some blocks. I didn’t know exactly what to do.

Then I remembered a quilt block project I started with a dear friend. We agreed to always have blue in each square and shop for fabric at least once a year. I followed the directions to a T and made 2 blocks each time, keeping one and giving one three times.

She confessed to me that she hadn’t made blocks for herself, just had squeaked out two for me over the two years. We agreed to take a breather, a break for her to catch up.

That was in the early 1980’s. I have kept the blocks and the fabrics in a project box. I realized we are never going to make that quilt. (I’m a little slow.)

I have five blocks for guild and laughed at myself. I also have three quilts I made with another Type A++ friend. We had the same set up and she would finish blocks so faithfully that we finished 3 friendship quilts in about 10 years.

The quilts are the good thing. The bad thing is that she kept me thinking that when people say, “Let’s have lunch” they actually want to have lunch.

When people mention getting together to me, I look at my calendar and send them dates.  Many must think I am crazy! I am trying to know that sometimes they are just being friendly. then re 2

Which made me realize I had another set of blocks. This set was for a star quilt for which I took a series of photos and sent them with step by step directions to my friend who was doing the quilt with me. She said she wasn’t finishing the blocks because she didn’t understand how to make them.

These blocks date from 2009, all three made by me. She must have a matching set of my blocks somewhere. She is probably so relieved I stopped sending mine.

The super good news is that I have 8 blocks to take to guild. And if this activity was proposed then other people must have these kinds of lonely blocks as well. Maybe I am not the only naive one around!

I have learned my lesson. I am not doing any “exchanges” unless we all send them somewhere and those who send, receive. I understand that some people get involved HOPING that it will work out!

I get it, I really do. And yes, maybe it has taken me waiting for my round robin top since March 15 of 2015. I’m never going to get it, am I?

But couldn’t the last person at least send me my fabric back?

Want to see other lessons I am learning and enjoy more quilty fun? Check out my Facebook page. Like the page and join the conversation!

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I published a post on the blocks for a  Friendship quilt that did work out. Here is a post about the quilt itself. Our first quilt, blue and white mugs is pictured here. Our second quilt, a Christmas quilt is here. Some commitments are gratefully kept!

Filed under: blogapalooza, quilt block

Tags: commitments

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