The New Name for the Modern Mom: My Toddler's Tomato?

Labels. I can’t seem to shake one label in particular now that I am a middle class suburban mother who just so happens to drive a mini van. “BB” (before baby) I had so many opinions, most of which have been abandoned due to necessity and a tight budget. I am not going to say I was forced to buy a minivan, but I will say that I was sick of loading my two children and an 80 pound dog into a Honda Accord.

I am looking to make a new label for suburban mothers, and hopefully it will cast a positive light on the modern mom. Let’s review some of the names we have used to label mothers in the past…

Soccer Mom-A little passe, don’t you think? This phrase began in the mid 90’s… And, isn’t Victoria Beckham considered the queen of soccer moms???

MILF-This ugly acronym has to go. Ladies, let’s take a step forward, shall we?

Yummy Mummy-Typically referred to woman under the age of 30 in the UK, kind of funny yet a fluffier version of MILF

Susie Homemaker-According to, Susie Homemaker is the “personification of the quintessential female American housewife.”

Douche-BagYes, Douche-bag. Apparently the teens of today like to use that word in more ways than one.

So what can we call the
modern mom? Any ideas? I am proud to say I do not consider
myself a Soccer Mom or a MILF. I want to stand up with the
mothers of the world and shout from the mountain top that I am a:

 Toddler’s Tomato
Domestic Rock Star

Home-loving Mama  

Homespun Honey

Child Rearing Sheba

Decked-out Domestic Dame

I would love to hear your ideas! What kind of mom are you?


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  • I've never heard the term "yummy mummy" before and I kinda like it! It is so much better than "old hag". I participated in a market research study years ago, and the company referred to stay at home mothers as domestic engineers. I use that term a lot, though I'm always worried that it will require me to know way too much about math and science.

  • Yes, I like Yummy Mummy, too. A couple of months ago I was loading my kids into my car and these younger people called me a soccer mom under their breath. I responded, "My kids don't even play soccer!" Great come back, I know!

  • I think my favorite of your options is Child Rearing Sheba! I can't think of anything good right now because the flu has shut down half of my brain!

  • LOL...this is a GREAT article. I am all about breaking sterotypical names or slang for people in society. Being gay, I've heard them all at this point, but I think mothers have as many if not more names that we do. First off, any kid calling you or any mother a "Douche-bag" needs a good ole fashioned "B-Slap" to the face. Mothers are amazing and I would not be here unless it was for my idol and best friend (aka my mother). But I would love to say I think "Domestic Rock Star" is a thumbs up!

  • In reply to TheMaskedServer:

    Thank you! I am sure as my children get older, I will be hearing more than just the usual, "Mama, you have poo poo on your face." as an insult, but I will never be called a Douche-bag, I can tell you that! :) Hooray for your "Domestic Rock Star" mom and all the other Slave Drivers out there! (My friends daughter called her a slave driver recently...)

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