Category: Uncategorized

I'm Meredith Grey and I need to learn to save myself.

Do you want to know a secret? I’ve always wanted to be saved. I’ve tried it a thousand different ways. Friendship, religion, sex, alcohol, dating, writing, avoiding, running. People pleasing, people hating, gossip, gratitude, sobriety. CrossFit, Paleo, binge eating, music, Netflix, starvation. Fitting in, standing out, being the best, being the worst, needing all the... Read more »

New Year, Old Memories

Sometimes you hear words you wish you could unhear. You ask someone a question, praying for an answer you know you won’t get. And then, as soon as you get the answer you weren’t hoping for…your mind fills. Every memory. Each moment. The good. The awful. The hope. The mistakes. Every awkward encounter since. How... Read more »

Anxiety and depression: mental health week 2015

I’ve racked my brain for days on how to write this post. I can’t find the words. It feels so raw, like I’m being exposed. Which is how I know I have to write it. I joke often about my anxiety. Or I at least try my damnedest to find the upside. Find the good.... Read more »

Miranda Lambert, Emily Bronte, and C.S. Lewis walk into a bar

(I missed Blogapalooz Hour Wednesday night but I REALLY love this topic so I’m giving myself an hour and am writing it now. Okay? Okay.) The names Miranda Lambert, Emily Bronte, and C.S. Lewis don’t exactly go together. It’s kind of like the beginning of a joke. A country singer, a writer of a classic... Read more »

Trading in excitement for enchantment

Admittedly, my blog was a bit more fun when I was a bit more of a mess. It was funnier. It had many more drunken adventures and sleepover stories of nights spent with men I never should have even been talking to. It had more drama and sassier comebacks when I was placing blame on... Read more »

That's what was missing last time

It’s tough to battle all the insecurities that came from relationships past when you’re trying to work through a long distance present to get to a happily ever after future. Being a plane ride away from each other is the toughest. And sometimes it’s just too tough. Something is over that I didn’t want to... Read more »

15 years later, I miss you just as much

It’s been 15 years since you both left me. Sometimes the sadness of it all is enough to break me. I’ve spent more than one night crying myself to sleep because you guys aren’t here. I think of the things you’ve missed, the moments you haven’t gotten to see and it physically hurts me. But... Read more »

In real life

In real life I’m purposeful. In real life I think. Constantly. I’m in my head every second of the day. And more often than not I’m told that’s a negative thing. But I’ve come to disagree. For me, it’s a positive, because being in my head keeps me in real life. The biggest thing I’ve... Read more »

In The Middle

In all reality I’m middle aged. Now I know, at 31, that sounds crazy. But it’s true. I am in the middle. I’m not old, but I’m not young. I’m in the middle. Want to know a secret? The middle kinda fucking sucks. The middle is the hard part. The monotonous part. The part where... Read more »


Sometimes it doesn’t matter who you’ve lashed out at. And it doesn’t matter who’s lashed out at you. If I had a dollar for every time someone’s lost their temper with me, I’d be a millionaire. A billionaire, if I counted all the times I’ve lost MY temper with someone. But it doesn’t matter anymore.... Read more »