Everyone has had a moment in their life that has been life changing. Some people may say that they have had only one event, but not me, I have had several. Maybe I look at life differently because I do not believe my life is much different than others. I also do not believe that only crises cause life changing experiences. What I do believe is that any moment in one’s life which makes someone reassess their own existence causing them to alter their behavior is life changing.
The birth of my children was life changing. I am sure it was life changing for my husband too. All I know is that I was responsible for their survival and I was so afraid of making a colossal mistake. While I made mistakes, plenty of them, I never lost sight that my actions, my parenting, would help shape the person they will become. My actions, decisions, my everything would affect them somehow, how could that not be life changing?
Getting the diagnosis of kidney cancer changed me, how could it not. While the prognosis is excellent, and I have been cancer free for 7 years, I still worry that it may return. What scared me then, and continues to scare me is that I would not be around to share experiences with my family and friends. I also realized how important it was for me to make a difference in the lives of others. Because of this I began to work more diligently on that goal after my diagnosis.
My son’s health crisis changed me in ways I never even imagined. It is a horrible thing to go through your own health crisis, a spouse’s, or even a parent’s, however, to watch your child go through one is unimaginable. You learn so many things about yourself. His health crisis showed me never to take life for granted, that there are more important things than petty arguments. I learned never to hold back in showing my love to my family and friends because they deserve to know how important they are to me. I learned that writing a bucket list and f**k it list is not enough–it’s the checking off the items on the list is what really matters. I also learned that regrets will always happen, however, acting on those controllable ones is the real goal.
Life changes occur for many different reasons. For me, I want my life changes to be positive ones. My children bring me joy every day. They are not afraid to show love, generosity, and compassion to others. My cancer diagnosis and my son’s health crisis could have changed me for the worse but I refuse to let it. Instead. what I try to do is to use these life events as a reminder to be a better person. I not only want my words to mean something, but my actions too. The truth is that life is short and no one really knows what tomorrow will bring–all I know is that tomorrow does not come for every one so make the most of it.
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