Tag: grief and loss

Living on after a loved one's suicide: After Anthony Bourdain and all the others

Suicide – so final, so impulsive, so theoretically preventable, so hard to understand, so very hard to forgive. I am going to miss Anthony Bourdain, who died of suicide yesterday in Paris, a few days after fashion icon Kate Spade did in New York. I will miss Anthony in a devoted TV viewer sort of way. ... Read more »

Dave's Mom, the Everymom

I miss Letterman at night when I used to take those last minutes of the day to settle in with someone with a bad attitude after I had spent all day being pleasant and positive and therapeutic. But I might miss Dave’s Mom more. Lately, oddly, I’ve been wondering about her, before I found out that... Read more »

Looking at grieving through a new lens: The Book

I’ve been looking at the world through one lens for a while now, and it’s got my eyes open. I catch a bit of Mrs. Doubtfire on TV and it seems so sad to me. Funny too, but at its heart, so sad. I spend Tuesday nights with This Is Us waiting to learn how Jack died, and... Read more »

The best meal of my life: Fried chicken with memories

The best meal of my life was on a beautiful fall day, crisp and bright blue, the day of the memorial service following my mom’s death from Alzheimer’s Disease. She had died a few weeks earlier, under hospice care, with two of us present. The relief we felt was real, as the years’ long decline that took... Read more »

Lessons in facing death and grieving with energy and intention: A book

My doctor friend told me, with urgency, to read this book. We trade book recommendations and I always leave her company with a sticky note filled with new titles. She is unafraid to look disease in the face, and  the same with death, so her favorites tend to be raw and disturbing, which is right... Read more »

If you are grieving today… for your pet

Elizabeth was losing her constant companion, running buddy, the protector who saved her from a late-night assault, the one who got her through an unwanted divorce, the one constant in 15 years of life changes. He was dying, and there was no one else to care for him. Besides, she needed to be the one... Read more »

Prince and Bowie meet in heaven

The first thing I thought of when I heard of Prince’s death was David Bowie, also recently gone. What they have in common is obvious – their atypical attire, their androgyny, bold and pioneering music, passionate fans who can tell you the moment they first heard the artist, creativity that outstrips others’, vision far beyond... Read more »

What I learned at the estate sale: Some endings come at the right time

The signs went up overnight: ESTATE SALE. By the time I went out for my morning walk, cars were everywhere down the street and around the block, surrounding the severe Mid-century modern house, all concrete and corners. It was sidewalk-colored, and looked like it should have a loading dock. From the outside, it looked like... Read more »

Grieving through action and remembering: Donna Day 2016

Today is Donna Day, the annual effort to raise funds for pediatric cancer in memory of the young daughter of one of my fellow bloggers here at ChicagoNow Mary Tyler Mom. She is tireless in her pursuit of her goal to save other families from the experience their family endured. You can learn more about... Read more »

David Bowie and the permission to be different, and more

Since David Bowie died, everywhere on social media, in print, on the news, in conversation, one message predominates: He made it okay to be different.  Citing this song or that album or video, or for the lucky ones, that concert, people remember the time when he did it for them. In fact, he invited us... Read more »