Why I think Pinkwashing is bullsh*t

The video above is me talking shit about this “Pinkwashing” nonsense while wearing my pink nightmare jambes, (that’s what I call ’em) and my Gryffindor hat. Fuck yeah, Harry Potter. However, I have to be honest here. When I took the sorting quiz on Pottermore, I was sorted into Ravenclaw, but I don’t have a Ravenclaw hat. But I digress….

One of the very few perks of being a blogger with a decent readership is the regular flow of emails from readers alerting me to funny, strange, or interesting shit. I dig the fact that the people who read my stuff enjoy the same kind of intelligent and twisted nonsense that I do. The vast majority of the articles, blogs, and book blurbs that come my way are sent because people think I’d enjoy them. The rest are articles, blogs, and book blurbs that people know will draw out a balls-to-the-fucking-wall rant from hell.

I like that.

I really do. I appreciate the idea that you want me to spin some rage, to speak for you when you can’t find the words. I could fill a hundred notebooks with lists of things I suck at, but one thing I don’t suck at is expressing my opinion and finding a way to articulate my observations about absurd and random crap. My friend, Tim, and several other MWDAS readers sent me this link. Go ahead and read it. I’ll wait.

Childproofing Harry Potter

I guess I have to add something to the list I suck at today, as I can’t even fucking begin to find the words to describe how much I disagree with this woman. I think she’s off her goddamn nut. I really do. But of course that’s just my opinion.

So often, people describe me as nice. I am nice. I am kind and generous and considerate for the most part, but that’s not difficult for me. Being superficial and polite to strangers is a cakewalk. Any idiot can do it. But you know what’s hard (aside from rocks and erect penises)? I’ll tell you what’s hard.

Being quiet about what I believe to be a profound example of dumbfuckery, another example of modern day helicopter parenting. The writer of this blog post is, in fact, a fucking writer. She writes books! How would she feel if someone “pinkwashed” her shit? I’m going to assume she believes in her words and stands by her content, and like most writers, is protective of her creations. I know good goddamn well I am.

So what the fuck?

Whatever. Everyone is entitled to an opinion, and I respect her right to have an opinion, even if I think her opinion is all sorts of FUBAR. The world is hard. The world is good. Humans know this from the moment they are conscious beings. I don’t think she’s giving her kid enough credit. I wouldn’t insult my kids by “pinkwashing” shit. You know why? Well, because I fucking respect them. They are too smart and too cool for that shit.

What I fucking do when reading books with my kids is discuss these issues with them. I ask questions, encourage dialogue, and help them process the intense emotions, ideas, and moral issues addressed in the story. Kids may live in a cocoon of sorts, and that’s how it should be when they are small. That’s how we keep them safe, but that cocoon shouldn’t be made of fucking adamantium (that’s the shit Wolverine’s claws are made from. Nothing can break it, motherfucker. NOTHING).

The protection we offer them should be permeable. They should be able to breathe and see and listen and process, especially if some of the things they need to process are different and difficult. People kill. People hurt. People die. Human beings are capable of unspeakable acts as well as overwhelming generosity. We are complex. Part of growing up is being able to integrate the world into our being-ness. We become who we are, in part, by learning to tolerate frustration, sadness, and disagreements without breaking under the stress and losing our sense of who we are.

That’s what stories are for! That’s why we read to our kids! That’s why there are so many goddamn children’s books out there. Life is hard. And good. And bad shit happens to good people. Some people think green veggies taste like shit. I know I do, and so do my kids.

I’m not saying we shouldn’t protect our children from harm and hardness. We should. I just think that as parents, we should use some fucking common sense in discerning just what they need protection from. And I don’t think it’s a big deal for kids to know that most people think spinach and broccoli taste like ass, or that Harry Potter tells people to shut up and has to fight the ultimate evil. Of course that’s just my opinion.


My kids don’t have to like their veggies, but like Molly Weasley, I’m in charge around here and ain’t no kids book dissin’ the green stuff is powerful enough to make my kids think any other way. EAT YOUR FUCKING VEGGIES, KIDS!

I’m not judging Lynn Messina. I am disagreeing with her.

And obviously, so do many of my readers, as evidenced by the number of emails I received containing the link to her article, asking me to rip off a rant. I’m not picking a fight. I’m doing what my readers asked me to do and at the same time, doing what I do best – one of the only good goddamn things I can do. I am articulating my observations about absurd and random crap.

I think Lynn’s “pinkwashing” is crap. I guess I don’t have to add not being able to articulate how I feel to the list after all. BAZINGA, MOTHERFUCKERS!

I’m listening to Logan LaPlante, and listening to MY kids as well. I’m treating them with respect and providing them with the opportunity to engage in the sort of honest and serious dialogue I know they are capable of.

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