Category: Grief

The Unimaginable: A Grieving Parent On 'Hamilton'

Is a spoiler alert required for historical events that occurred over 200 years ago?  I’m told it isn’t, but consider this your official spoiler alert. My husband and I were presented with the totally unexpected opportunity to go see ‘Hamilton’ last week.  After agreeing that the family will be eating three squares of oatmeal for... Read more »

Mary Tyler Moore, My Patron Saint of Hope

“You’re gonna make it after all.”   I am writing these words through tears, a full 24 hours (now almost 48, as the words did not coming easily) after hearing the news of Mary Tyler Moore’s death.  The death of an 80 year old should never surprise, but the death of this particular 80 year... Read more »

Bridges and Threads and Sundaes: Connecting Our Kids to Those Who Would Love Them, But Are Dead

My Mom died when I was pregnant with my first child, a daughter who was named for her.  Four years later my daughter died.  And five years after that my Dad died.  Three of the most important and loved people in the world to me will never be known by my two sons.  That just... Read more »

Bad, Bad Leroy Brown: The Funeral Recessional That Never Was

This post is part of ChicagoNow’s monthly “Blogapalooza” feature where bloggers are provided a prompt and required to write and publish a post within an hour.  Tonight’s prompt was this:  “Pick a song that has special meaning to you and explain why.” My Dad’s been on my mind a lot today.  Probably because the first... Read more »

The Little Louis CK That Lives On My Shoulder

A couple of weeks ago my husband surprised me with tickets to see Louis CK.  It was a birthday gift and a rare night out for the two of us.  Just two middle aged folks out on the town hoping for a few laughs.  What could possibly go wrong? HA HA HA HA HA!  Have... Read more »

My Invisible Daughter

Can you see her?  She’s there.  Right there, always. My daughter died seven years ago, next month.  She was four.  The concept of time plays with me on all things related to her.  How is it possible that she has been gone so much longer than she was here?  How is it possible that I... Read more »

TOOT TOOT: That's Me Blowing My Own Horn!

This post is part of ChicagoNow’s monthly “blogapalooza” series, where our community manager provides a writing prompt to all bloggers with the only rule being it must be published within one hour.  This month’s prompt: “Write about a period in your life when you were at your best.” Dammit.  This is a tough thing to... Read more »


When I was in college I took a literature course about African American women writers.  Zora Neale Hurston, Alice Walker, Toni Morrison, Maya Angelou, Gwendolyn Brooks — so many amazing writers.  One of the central themes of the class was something the professor called “motherlines.”  Her theory was that these writers used the lessons we... Read more »

How My Mother Made Me a Mom

I was not that little girl growing up that knew she always wanted to be a mother.  I rarely played with baby dolls and never had interest in babysitting as I got older.  Raising children just didn’t seem to be my calling.  And that was okay with me. Even when I married at age 30,... Read more »

Middle Aged White Lady Mourns Prince

A couple of hours ago I learned that Prince had died.  I stepped away from the extended family vacation I am in the midst of to just catch my breath and noodle on Facebook for a moment or two.  Immediately I saw the news that Prince was dead at 57.  Prince.  Dead.  It seems inconceivable... Read more »