So the newest Tiger Woods “accident” story has progressed and taken on a meaning and life of its own. Surprise, surprise, surprise. Out of the golf greens emerges a Los Angeles cocktail waitress, Jaimee Grubbs, who informed US Weekly that she had a hot and heavy romance with Tiger Woods. Unfortunately, for Tiger, if true, another shocker, Jaimee has voice mail recordings and text messages to prove her affair. From the sounds of the US Weekly article, Jaimee has kept score of her sexual encounters with Tiger as she claims there are 20 such encounters. I wonder if Tiger gave her a golf score card where she could tally the “hole in one” and perfect “strokes” totals.
Tiger’s alleged affair has become a media feeding frenzy. As a divorce
lawyer, I am constantly asked as to the reason a married man with
millions or billions of dollars, power and stature would risk it all
just for a tawdry piece of tail. The stories are similar and the
search for a logical answer for such nonsensical conduct becomes
nonexistent . Obviously, looking for a commonsense answer does not
work because affairs of the ego (and “head”) do not stem from a sound
Here is how it typically happens: The hunter is bored, starts having a
seven year itch or a mid life crisis. He believes he is omnipotent.
After all, look at all he has accomplished and achieved in his life. He
meets this “amazing” woman who, for whatever reason, makes him feel
like a teenager and the sex is mind-blowing. He cannot control his
urges and feels even more invincible. He enjoys the secrecy of this hot
and heavy romance and perhaps may actually “get off” on the danger.
Then it hits: The mistress becomes more and more demanding and needy.
Mr. Powerful starts feeling trapped, the excitement wanes and so does
his libido. The excitement is replaced with conditions and perceived
nagging. So, he ends the affair and returns to his wife and
So, let’s fast forward. The affair is over, the “other woman” is
scorned and dumped. Mr. Powerful left all kinds of evidence, including
oral evidence such as voice mails on her answering machine, text
messages, emails and cards in his handwriting. If he was extra sloppy
like Mark Sanford, he charged the items on his credit card instead of
paying cash. Voice mails can be used because there is no reasonable
expectation of privacy when you know you are being recorded. Text
messages and emails or worse, a dress with a certain stain, if saved
properly, potentially link him to the paramour. Essentially, Mr.
Powerful has left a paper and evidence trail even O.J’s prosecution
team could track.
What “drives” the powerful successful man to cheat and ignore basic
logic is simple– the adrenaline rush of the conquest coupled with a megalomaniac ego. Powerful and extremely successful men have certain
attributes and characteristics that inherently make them susceptible to
cheating. Most powerful and successful men have built their empires on
extreme risks, incredible sacrifices and their own determination to win
at all costs. If we factor in Tiger Woods is an athlete, the
explanation becomes even clearer. This type of man is a ferocious
competitors with an ability to exceed the limits of success. They are
risk takers with their own set of rules. After attaining such wealth,
eminence and power, they become used to getting what they want and
thrive on the challenge itself.
Along comes another beautiful woman but this time, she is savvy enough
to know how to “play” the power game and become the target of his
conquest. She knows how to keep him interested by being disinterested
and unavailable. This beauty is different or so he thinks. The “Tiger”
becomes unleashed because he now wants what he cannot have. The hunt
begins and all sight of logic and the rules are ignored. The pursuit
and challenge are more important than even the woman…it is about
winning. The problem with such reckless arrogance is that the
reality of the downfall or consideration of the consequences is not
even an issue. After all, to err is human and forgiveness will
follow…or will it?