This summer, we will be treated to the Summer Games of August, our political equivalent of the Hunger Games. Dueling conventions will whip party loyalists into a donkey and elephant embellished crowd. Those watching at home will swing from indifference, to repulsion, to investment in the characters on the screen.
When it is over, those who have been whip-sawed by the rhetorical acumen of both parties will be left to wade through the falsehoods, exaggerated claims, and realities of the election cycle.
But that should not get in the way of celebratory opportunities. No matter how we vote, we can agree that we live in the greatest nation in the world, because we are free to vote. So let the barbecues begin! Break out the beers, and mingle with your fellow citizens, despite party differences! Celebrate democracy in action! Show the politicians that we do not wish to be separated by our differences, but united by our similarities.
Orvis has the perfect shorts for gentlemen inclined to sport their party loyalties: convention shorts. Red bermuda shorts are available for Republicans with embroidered elephants, and the blue states are celebrated with donkeys on navy shorts. They are both made of Bush cotton, however. At $89.00, with dry cleaning required, I somehow think there will be larger sales of the tusked version.
If there is a wish to eschew party affiliation, and just demonstrate the pride in the UNITED STATES of America, rather than Red or Blue States- there is a third option: shorts sporting Old Glory. Since every summer is sprinkled with holidays where we hoist the flag, this is the perfect Father’s Day gift.
Let the Games begin.