Thinking + Communication: Couples

Individually and as a society, communication is one of the most important things that we both value and try to run away from. “I want to communicate across the planet” – “I avoid telling you how it went last night.” Sometimes we have to swap our priorities, set aside our formal business, and take care of our personal and relational affairs.

As an individual who is part of a couple, you need to remember what is going right, and maintain knowledge of the bond. That bond creates the feel of the marriage between you. Make sure your individual life is going excellently – the way you want it – so you have gifts to bring back to the couple in the way of innovations, sociable connections, know-how, professional development and stories. Remember to Keep and Live your Couple Life and Individual Lives Benevolently, richly and in Equilibrium.

Thought Side of Couples
Both sides of a couple need to check on their Compatibility, Synchronicity, their Capacity and Capability to Evolve Together, and Marriageability of their Plans and Concepts for the Future. Based on these aspects, they determine their level of commitment. They may decide to create a dedicated marriage, or a part-time relationship, or an occasional friendship. Their maintaining contact has to do with strong or subtle life growth and sustainability.

Communication Side of Couples
>Couples want to keep their instinctual communication to be in sync with each other. Some are quiet; some are brazen; some just move in compatible timing.

>Argue – not for conflict – but because you want to know what is real and true.

>Check. Especially if you don’t know, check to see what is needed, what is wanted, what the facts are, and what else is going on.

>Communicate about Consistency, Stability, and Dependability required by preference and for compatibility.

>Conversely communicate about the level of Variety each of you needs Proactively and in Experience.

>Agree to work on the Difficult Conversations of: saying what you think and feel, keeping up with each other, being proactive and responsive in your love life, and working With each other in public and in private as a couple.

>As a couple, Keep Up your Obligations or Simplify to a level each of you can meet constructively. Keep each your Consequences and Learn from them. Don’t fight what is fair or natural, or each of you will lose perspective and depth on what is fair and natural.

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