If I knew they were single, I would talk to them. I hear that just about every time I’m encouraging my friends to talk to a stranger when we’re out. And while I call B.S. on them, this does seem to be one of the biggest barriers for striking up a conversation with someone you don’t know. That instant failure when the guy or girl reveals that they are dating someone. Fear of rejection keeps them from even trying, which means they’ve also already failed.
I know, not everyone is like me when I grab a Corona jacket and a bucket of beer to approach a table full of guys to give away free beer to anyone who is single. Somewhere along the way, I just stopped caring. I laughed when they asked how they could trust that I didn’t roofie the beer that still had the cap securely on the bottle. I chuckled at the guys who took the beer just because it was free and their girlfriends didn’t want them spending money on such “good beer”. If you can’t laugh at yourself, or with other people, then you’re probably putting too much pressure on the situation.
If you’re not bold enough YET to strike up a conversation with a random stranger, try it online. My friend was tired of all the guys just messaging her “hey” (aren’t we all) so she put three questions in her Tinder profile with my favorite being, “what burger condiment do you identify with the most?” She’s on to the next with the guys who are too cool to answer the question and then don’t reciprocate the question. Cheese, of course, because she’s from Wisconsin! I love that she created questions that cut through the small talk because she asked icebreaker questions that showed her personality.
My online profile talks about getting a pedicure on the way to my fantasy football draft because sports are an important part of my life, especially in the Fall. The more you ask, the easier it is to do. What questions will break the ice for you?