Don't Feel Sorry For Me Or the Cubs Because We Don't Have Rings, Yet

As the holidays are approaching, I’ve been thinking about one of my favorite posts that I’ve written since I started blogging three years ago. What makes it so special is that it was a collaboration with three of my single friends. It was an open holiday letter to single ladies that was meant to inspire women to just be themselves while also reminding everyone else that we are doing just fine. We shared four different stories with the common theme of celebrating our birthdays alone.


The trip was amazing, but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t scared going in to my birthday week. After day one I felt empowered and completely free. I could do whatever I wanted whenever I wanted. I left New Orleans being more secure with myself than ever before. When people asked if I was on a business trip because I was out alone, I confidently said “no” and they thought it was awesome that I took a vacation alone. Just because I’m single doesn’t mean I should wait to explore the world. One day, when I’m in a relationship, I will look back proudly that I cherished this time while being secure with my own self. Cheers to being independent!


To be honest, I was truly hoping someone would come to Memphis to surprise me for the weekend, but after the virtual birthday party, I truly realized I did not need anyone to be there physically with me. I have never felt so loved even though I was all alone for what turned out to be the best birthday of my life.


If given the choice, would I do this trip over the same way? Yes, a thousand times over!  Looking back, I am actually glad that none of my friends were able to come because traveling alone is an experience that I’m not sure I would have actively sought out given different circumstances. 


I wanted to spend my birthday thinking about where I’ve been and ultimately where I want to go since these were things I always talked to my brother about on my birthday. Death usually triggers self-reflection, but when I told my friends I was thinking about taking a trip alone for my birthday, they thought I was crazy.

It’s true that people feel sorry for me because I’m still single, but that’s only because they don’t understand how completely full my life is. As you know, I have my fair share of dates, but don’t be sad that I haven’t found the one. I’ve had relationships with several amazing guys who are still very important parts of my life, so I feel lucky to be living this life.

On Monday night, my friend texted saying she had two tickets to the Cubs-Indians World Series game in Cleveland the next night. I called my Mom, a die-hard Cubs fan, and asked her if she wanted to drive to Cleveland in a few hours. She screamed, “I’m going to the World Series” and woke my Dad out of a sound sleep. Within 12 hours we were on the road to Ohio.

When I posted photos from the World Series, I started receiving dozens of messages, with most having the word “jealous” in them. They also asked how I was able to make a trip on such short notice, and I thought, because that’s what I do. I do whatever I want whenever I want with the most amazing people in my life.

So don’t feel sorry for me because I don’t have a ring on my finger, and don’t feel sorry for the Cubs because they also don’t have a ring … yet. Everyone should live the life that is right for them, appreciate what they have and continue working towards who they want to be. Be happy for the single women in your life because they are doing amazing things. And single ladies, let’s continue to kick ass!


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