Not everyone loves Tinder. Some are scared. Some have been dissed. Some message for months and never meet up. But I love it. I joined almost a year ago on my 40th birthday and have been entertained ever since. Good or bad, Tinder gives you a chance to meet someone. It just depends on the expectations you set for using it.
Over the last eleven months, any time someone complained about Tinder, I asked them why. Below are some of my favorite excerpts from those conversations.
The profiles make “me” swipe left because of the written description:
– They use the limited space to complain about all the annoying things that have happened to them on Tinder so far.
– They complain that so many woman ask how tall they are. How many woman are you talking to that you’re so annoyed?
– The only text they write is a joke (e.g. if you don’t look like your pictures you’re buying me drinks until you do, I’m the best looking guy around when I’m at WalMart, every swipe right gives a puppy with cancer a new home).
– The entire profile description that is generic or uses too many clichés (e.g. work hard play hard, life’s too short, I love to laugh, you miss 100% of the shots you never take, I’m looking for my partner in crime).
– A guy in his 40s who wants kids “someday”. Someday? Dude, you’re 40.
– Guys who use nicknames.
– They are embarrassed to be on Tinder and say they will lie about where you met if it works out.
– They fill the space, but say nothing because they spent the time writing about how they don’t know what to say.
– They say “Where do I start? I’m not good at this.” Good at what? Writing? Providing a description?
– Their education says “School of Hard Knocks”.
– They use the space to let people know all the reasons they will reject you, like duck face photos and pictures with tigers (Really? That’s a thing?)
The profiles make “me” swipe left because of the photos they post:
– All of their photos are in Halloween costumes. Really creepy costumes.
– They take a photo in the car, with the seatbelt, which makes me wonder if they were driving when they took it?
– Pictures in the passenger seat. Can’t the driver take your photo, perhaps not inside the car?
– Cats! So many cats.
– I want to date a guy who owns a boat, but not one he uses to fish.
– No distinguishable photos (e.g. far away shot, sports logo, meme).
– It’s one crappy photo. Are they even trying?
– Group photos where their friends are way cuter than they are.
– The main photo is a before and after weight loss picture.
– They’re trying too hard when they post photos with their grandmas.
– Why are there so many pictures with fish?
– They photoshop a hockey mask over their friends’ faces to protect their identity.
– They are flipping off the camera.
– They look mad.
– They take a picture in their dirty bathroom.
– They take a picture in the mirror at the gym.
– All of their photos have kids, but they don’t actually have any kids.
– They post a photo with a sweater tied around their necks or waists.
– They wear jerseys when they clearly aren’t at a game.
So, it sounds difficult to pick the perfect photo. After a friend captured my excitement at Top Golf last week, I asked my guy friends if I should post it on my profile. Here is what they said:
– You look like you’re having fun, but in a crazy kinda way.
– It’s cool that you know how to play golf, but your face doesn’t look great.
– I always like to see a full body shot, but I’m so distracted by your face, and not in a good way.
– Who plays golf in a dress and sandals?
Profiles are completely subjective so you never know what people will think is awesome or annoying, so just be yourself and keep on swiping! What observations have you made during your time on Tinder?