Where in the world is Mike Pence?

Where in the world is Mike Pence?

Do you remember the television show and computer game “Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?” Carmen was an international thief who stole treasures from many locations throughout the world. She’d leave clues and based upon those hints, you would try to find her. Fun stuff!

This week our current vice-president is doing his version of Carmen. No, he’s not stealing jewels…maybe… he’s just missing in action. He also has been leaving little clues. Let’s try to find him.

Well she sneaks around the world from Kiev to Carolina
She’s a sticky-fingered filcher from Berlin down to Belize
She’ll take you for a ride on a slow boat to China
Tell me where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?

The news broke on May 8, 2020…just nine short days ago. Katie Miller tested positive for Covid-19. She well known for marrying Stephen Miller, the confidant and speech writer for Donald Trump. Her real job is being the press secretary for Vice-President Mike Pence . She spends a lot of  her time in close contact with the Vice-President.

Katie went into self-quarantine. Although she was asymptomatic, she went home. Good job, Katie! Way to keep yourself safe, as well as not passing on the virus to others. Part of the deal with Covid-19 is if you’ve been in close contact with someone who has been diagnosed with it, you also go into self-quarantine mode for two weeks. Fourteen short days!

Mike Pence didn’t buy into that. He told reporters, who in turn told the public, that he was going back to work immediately. No lying low in a room by himself. Doesn’t matter how many people at the White House he might infect, he’s going to fight through it. You see, working while infected shows strength. Being self-quarantined shows weakness. That’s not allowed in Trump-land. It might even cost you a place on the upcoming presidential election ticket.

So Mr. Tough guy is supposedly going to show up at the White House, but on Monday, no Pence. Tuesday, no Pence. Wednesday, still no sign of the VP. Hmmmm….is Mike coming to work or not? Is he actually under a self-quarantine? Isn’t that a show of weakness? And if he is at home, is he keeping away from “mother?”

Hmmmm…..this is a guy who thought it wasn’t necessary to wear a mask at the Mayo Clinic. Blowing off work for a week because of a little old virus isn’t like him, right?

So I just have one little question….Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego……errrrr……Mike Pence?

Steal their Seoul in South Korea, make Antarctica cry Uncle
From the Red Sea to Greenland they’ll be singing the blues
Well they never Arkansas her steal the Mekong from the jungle
Tell me where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?

You know…I’ve kinda missed the guy. In the early days of the coronavirus task force, he would usually give us one piece of useful information at those daily press briefings. You’d get to work your brain to sort that out from the other twenty or so minutes he spent sucking up to his boss. It was a good way to keep your mind from atrophying.

So again I ask….Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego….errrr….Mike Pence?

She go from Nashville to Norway, Bonaire to Zimbabwe
Chicago to Czechoslovakia and back!
Ooh, Botswana to Thailand, Milan via Amsterdam,
Mali to Bali, Ohio, Oahu…!

Rumor has it that he was part of the presidential retreat at Camp David over the weekend. Have you seen any pictures of him? I haven’t! Besides, the Don is scared of germs and was supposedly livid that his underlings let the virus into the White House. He wouldn’t let an infected Pence anywhere near him, right?

Stories have now surfaced that the Vice-President will be making a trip to Orlando, Florida this Wednesday. He’ll be meeting with their Governor, who is another Trump lackey…a true kindred spirit of Pence. They’ll discuss how to get tourism back to the sunshine state. Then Mike will be doing another photo op at another nursing home. You think he’ll wear a mask?

Ahhhh…now these stories makes sense because:
a) It’s close to the amount of time he should have been under self-quarantine conditions. Even it’s not the full fourteen days, what’s a day or two to this administration.
b) It’s Florida. They’ve been taking their chances with Covid-19 since the start of the pandemic. An infected Vice-President is nothing to them. It’s just a minor nuisance in their state’s ignoring the virus.

Welcome back, Mike. It hasn’t been the same without you. But just one question….Katie’s hubby seems to missing in action, too. Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego...errrrr….Stephen Miller?

Well she glides around the globe and she’ll flimflam every nation
She’s a double-dealing diva with a taste for thievery
Her itinerary’s loaded up with moving violations
Tell me where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?

Related Post: It’s scarier than usual to work in Donald Trump’s White House

Type your email address in the box and click the “create subscription” button. My list is completely spam free, and you can opt out at any time.



Leave a comment

  • Advertisement:
  • Advertisement:
  • ChicagoNow is full of win

    Welcome to ChicagoNow.

    Meet our bloggers,
    post comments, or
    pitch your blog idea.

  • Meet The Blogger

    Howard Moore

    My so called friends think it's time to edit this section. After four years, they may be right, but don't tell them that. I'll deny it until they die! I can't believe I've been writing this blog for four years. It started as a health/wellness thing and over the years has morphed to include so many things that I don't know how to describe it anymore. I really thought this was going to be the final year of the blog but then Donald Trump came along. It looks like we're good for four more years..God help us all! Oh yeah...the biographical stuff. I'm not 60 anymore. The rest you can read about in the blog.

  • Tags

  • Categories

  • Advertisement: