Category: Daddy issues

The sexism of moms and Legos

A story started circulating the other day about another amazing, crafty parent doing something over-the-top to please the kids in the house. We know how these usually go. It’s normally a dad into photography or who has access to special effects video software reaping enormous praise for being a good parent. Here are a few top... Read more »

How to annoy your wife when you're suddenly home all day

I’m used to my husband working 70-hour weeks and due to some recent boolshit EXCITING LIFE SURPRISES we are now suddenly hanging out in the house together. All the time. The last time I spent this much time with him was our honeymoon and I remember thinking, “wow, I’m really getting to know this guy!”. Eight years... Read more »

DiGiorno Pizza is not to blame for domestic violence #WhyIstayed

Did you hear about the poor guy who runs the DiGiorno Pizza twitter account who made the grave error of not researching the hashtag #WhyIstayed? He thought it was about love, so he tweeted, “#WhyIstayed You had pizza” with a picture of a lady giving some true romance to a box of food from the... Read more »

Stop saying, "Your English is great!"

Last night around 7:00, every restaurant in Wrigleyville had a 90-minute wait because the neighborhood was all hit at once with Billy Joel concert revelers. I guess old white people music (hi!) and Persian food don’t go hand in hand because for whatever reason, Raw Bar got us a table in ten minutes. We had... Read more »

Not All Dads

The daddy in our house has many talents. He can: – Salsa dance, kinda – Smoke those really gross cigarillos without gagging – Work our complex coffee machine. That thing is so annoying. It’s got like 30 buttons and they all just make coffee dust if I try it. He swoops in there like a... Read more »

When a breadwinner faces prison, the kids suffer twice

I’ll tell you, straight away, I have no sympathy for child abusers. Harming a defenseless person is unspeakable, not to mention a burden on the rest of us. According to Safe Horizon, child abuse is a $124 billion dollar problem and survivors of child abuse are 30% more likely to commit violent crime. When you... Read more »

What happens when a man wears a baby in Spain

This is my first time in Spain, so I’m learning as I go. It took sinking into an ice cold bath before I realized the faucet handle marked “C” stands for “caliente”. Whoops. Restaurants don’t open for dinner until 8:00PM and when they do, there are some interesting things on the menu. Like, cod donuts.... Read more »

STUDY: That rich-ladies-be-relaxin' stereotype about moms is bogus!

According to a recent Pew report, the stereotype of the rich, white, pampered stay-at-home-mom of the mommy wars infamy is actually complete horse shit. That’s right, according to new research, stay-at-home-moms are much more likely to be young, poor, non-white and/or immigrants lacking college degrees than they are to be part of the opt-out crowd.... Read more »

Seduction is not coercion - No means no for men too

There’s been a buzz lately about female rapists and their male victims. One particularly heart wrenching story appeared on Jezebel yesterday and to those men, I offer sympathy and support. However there’s another narrative taking place and it’s a dangerous one: the male victim of “seduction”. The American Psychological Association reports that 26% of male responders... Read more »

I asked my mother-in-law how she raised such a great son

I don’t usually like to give advice if I don’t have a dog in the fight. When the Chicago Public School teachers were on strike a few years ago, it irritated me seeing parents who had their kids in private school, like, “solidarity!” Right, solidarity, bro. Your kids aren’t even in CPS. Having a student... Read more »