When my friends follow me on Pinterest, I’ll admit, I get a little glow. Sure, I’m just recirculating everything I see on Anthropology, but it’s still flattering. And then there are the friends of friends and new people. Those make me feel important. The glimmer from the homemade play dough recipe I skated from someone else is somehow my glimmer. I also get a tingle when one of my pins gets repined. It’s like a little kiss from the sun and I didn’t have to do anything but click on pretty pictures and wish I had cuffed boots.
And then the cool girl from high school follows me or that snarky writer with the razor cut eyeliner. I have to perform! Now that that everyone’s at home painting wine bottles to look like zebra skin and taking pictures with chalkboards with inspiring messages written on them (or meaning to!) I have to BE MORE. Do more. The pressure is on. I have to find more cool stuff to pin that has never been pinned before. I must spend my days shirking my children’s appetites and letting my floors gather crud and waffle crumbs because I have to entertain the masses with my profound (yet simple! So simple!) projects and ideas.
Or maybe they’re following me for my Hilariously Ugly board. Hey, there’s some ugly stuff out there, I’m just the messenger. I can’t help it if someone thought damask was going to class up a vagina lamp.
Self, just put the Pinterest down. It’s an imaginary world where crafting never goes wrong, where headbands look good on everybody, where picture frames don’t hold pictures and bites of toast are artfully captured on $1400 cameras rendering them profound. It’s all a lie! Toast is not profound. And why is that mean saleslady I met twice in 2007 following me? How did she get my number? Do not want.
If you need me I’ll just be writing “love” on everyday objects and photographing them next to cupcakes. Well. I’ll be meaning to.
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