Could Wordle become even more pervasive, more viral., more annoying? Yes indeed. The New York Times, the proud owner of my morning headache, has given me one more reason to reach for the Advil bottle. With Wordle Bot, I can now compare my successes with players from, well I guess from everywhere.
And not only does Wordle Bot tell me if my score is better or worse than the average of everyone in the galaxy (I assume it is played on the International Space Station, and probably on Alpha Centauri too) it rates every guess I make — rates them for skill and for luck.
In typical NYT fashion, comments that accompany the ratings are usually gentle and friendly, with remarks such as “Great Job, Honey” or “Oh, that wasn’t correct, but I know you will solve this puzzle on your next try.”
I would like to improve those comments. Here are ten that would be more inspirational on my daily Wordle.
Ten Better Wordle Bot Comments
- Did your late grandmother (of blessed memory) help you on that one?
- Hey Bozo, you already know there aren’t any Z’s so IT CAN”T BE “ZEBRA.”
- Are you high???
- If you screw up again you will be canceled.
- Guess “PORNO” for a quick surprise.
- Dumb, dumb, dumb.
- Maybe you should give up Wordle for Lent?
- I could help you, but then I would definitely have to kill you.
- It’s all a Big Lie.
- Elon Musk has bought the rights to the word you have chosen. You may not use it.
But in the end, no matter what the comments are, my frustration is –Wordle, I can’t quit you!
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