G Rated Limericks for an X-Rated COVID-19 Time.




These limericks are all pure. It is the topic that is unfortunately obscene!


Dr. Fauci and Pritzker suggesting
That my lab should be doing some testing
But we can’t get machines
By any old means
I’m just worn out from all my requesting!

The virtual meetings are endless
While on transportation we spend less
Please use Facetime or Zoom
To dispel all your gloom
Or else you might end up as friendless.

It’s legal now to smoke chronic
The best stuff is grown hydroponic
But since COVID requires
I control my desires
I’ll stick to a cold Gin & Tonic.

Campaigning is tough for Joe Biden
But there’s something he’s got to decide in
He must choose his VP
A she, not a he
The White House someday she’ll preside in.

The downtown streets are all empty
But getting there just doesn’t tempt me
The rats are emerging
In big waves they’re converging
Don’t want them to all rub against me.

The swans on our pond are reposing
How many eggs in their nest not disclosing
They really can’t care less
About our COVID 19 mess
For them, it’s the geese they’re opposing.

We spend lots of time doing puzzles
While coffee and tea we both guzzle
The crosswords are tough
And Sudoku’s enough
To exercise every brain muscle.

If it’s in our house we have cleaned it
We have dusted and polished and sheened it
But to our great dismay
From March up till May
There is no one around who has seen it.

If you’re on the front lines we extoll you
Don’t want anything bad to control you
In your jobs please be safe
Though those face masks do chafe
You don’t need a virus to mole through.


Or if you prefer haiku. And as always, be safe out there!

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Swan photograph credit: Barbara Raff

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Filed under: COVID

Tags: COVID-19, limericks

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