If You are A Parent, or Have Ever Had One--The Forever Plan is for You

rodAnd don’t it seem like a long time…

…seem like a long time…

…seem like a long, long time.

Rod Stewart–1971

I am not sure if it quite qualifies as my favorite album, but Mod Rod’s masterpiece is the only recording I have ever bought in both the vinyl and CD versions. The album lays mouldering in a box in the basement (note to self–need to purge basement miscellaneous prior to move), but I still pull out the CD every once in a while. And I believe “Maggie May” may be the most played song on my playlist, just edging out “Sultans of Swing”.

Songs aren’t the only thing that lives forever. This weekend Barb and I upgraded our phones. Sunday night at a family dinner celebrating our anniversary, our 29 year old daughter Laury, an experienced math teacher, living in the city for years, asked if she was still included on our plan. She has taken the phone carrier’s “Family Plan” one step further and created “The Forever Plan.” With the “Forever Plan” some things just go on and on. Here are the features of the “Forever Plan.”

  1. Cell phone charges. The “Forever Plan” state the adult child’s iPhone charges must be paid for on the parent’s cell phone plan long as a potential carrier exists. This does not mean aforementioned child is under obligation to ever call parents.
  2. Health insurance. The Affordable Care Act has made this automatic on parent’s policies until the child hits age 26. With the “Forever Plan” there is no limit. Your adult children can be part of your plan until you hit Medicare age.
  3. Auto Insurance. Your child lives in the city and parks on the street, but under the “Forever Plan” you tell your insurance agent they still live in your suburban home and park in the garage. Lower premiums, but of course they are paid by the parents.
  4. Pet services. Parents must always be available to watch the dog, cat, parakeet or gold fish, no questions asked. Must also be available to respond to “The dog ate the Halloween candy. What do I do?” question at short notice.
  5. Emergency Road Service. Parents must always be available to assist at the site of a dead battery or overheated radiator. At a recent party, two sets of parents were obliged to interrupt there evening to respond to their adult children on this one. We are actually pretty proud that last time that Laury had a dead battery she did NOT call us.
  6. Home Repair Service. Under the “Forever Plan” washing machines are fixed, TV sets installed and toilets plunged. On repairs taking over 3 hours, the parent will bill the child for a large margherita pizza.
  7. Grandchild care. Ok, we would pay for the privilege of this one!

By the way, no insurance agent will sell you the “Forever Plan.” Why do parents do all this? We do it because we love our kids, the adults they have grown into and partnered with, and the choices they have made. If the plan was for sale, the premium would of course be priceless!

Now on to the home building. Barb is visiting a window showroom with the architect today. She will get to see the muntins first hand. For those of you unfamiliar with our muntin situation, here is a look back. Still not in for permits, but we hope to have a hole in the ground before the first frost. Anyone betting against us?

Kudos and Attaboy to buddy Roger, the only reader to correctly identify our Halloween costume. Some of you recognized Barb and I as Paul Stanley and Gene Simmons, but only Roger added in the berets, the striped shirts and the cravats to come up with FRENCH KISS. Now I understand why both Roger and I have been on TV game shows. Our minds are just warped enough.

A word about subscribing to the blog. Please do!!! After all, it is free! We have discovered that not all the subscriptions have gone through properly, so feel free to try again. Remember to read-comment-subscribe. And pass it on. Some things need to last forever!

Type your email address in the box and click the “create subscription” button. My list is completely spam free, and you can opt out at any time.

Leave a comment