Trump's colluding with Bernie, dontcha know

UPDATE: Wow. This might not be parody after all. Read Eric Zorn’s, “South Carolina Republicans’ plan: Help Trump by voting for Sanders in Dem primary. Will it work, or backfire?” Still, Eric doesn’t go into how some Sanders supporters are trying to downplay his socialism. True.

President Donald Trump’s fondest wish is to face Sen. Bernie Sanders in the general election. Trump believes that Bernie will be the easiest Democrat to beat, in the Democratic field of dreamers, radicals, kids and buffoons. Truly, a laydown.

Trump, despite his egomaniacal posturing, knows in his heart of hearts that facing someone closer to the center will siphon off the moderates, centrists, suburban women and scared-out-of-their-pants Republicans worried about what an unleashed Trump would do in his second term.

So, this is a conspiracy theory that’s true and can be ignored only at grave risk.

To make sure that he faces Loony Bernie, Trump is working covertly to secure his nomination in July at the Democratic National Convention in Milwaukee.

Chief among Trump’s clandestine activities is engaging Vladimir screen-shot-2020-02-13-at-1-19-24-pmVladimirovich Putin and his merry band of Russian of nerds to throw the primary elections to Bernie. That won’t be hard to do. Who’da think leaked that video of Michael Carpetbagger Bloomberg’s 2015 speech in which he defended aggressive police tactics, like stop and frisk, in minority neighborhoods?

Trump couldn’t help himself and went public, tweeting:

Mini Mike is a 5’4” mass of dead energy who does not want to be on the debate stage with these professional politicians. No boxes please. He hates Crazy Bernie and will, with enough money, possibly stop him.

That riled Bloomberg to respond in kind with his own tweeted insult:

We know many of the same people in NY. Behind your back they laugh at you & call you a carnival barking clown. They know you inherited a fortune & squandered it with stupid deals and incompetence.

In effect, Trump has revealed the real Bloomberg, who is as mouthy and goofy as the president himself. I mean, who in his right mind would vote for some as crazy as Trump. So long, Mikey. Brilliant move, Mr. President.

Here’s another one of the Trump/Russian collusions: Making Bernie seem less radical than he truly is. They’ve been surreptitiously spreading the world that Bernie isn’t really a “socialist.”  If he is a socialist, it’s only as English humanist Sir Thomas More understood it. Or something like Plato’s idealized society or the early Christian communities.

Bernie’s naive supporters have gobbled it up, arguing that Bernie’s “socialism” isn’t really Marxian. It’s more like Franklin Roosevelt’s progressive social and domestic programs such as  social security. Splendid move, Mr. President.

You even got an avowed socialist to proclaim that he knows socialism and Bernie’s no socialist. You the man, Mr. President.

Even the Associated Press fell for it. Reporting the results of the New Hampshire primary, the news service called Sanders a “progressive,” neglecting to label him a socialist anywhere in the story. Never mind that  Sanders calls himself a “democratic socialist.”  (But fails miserably to specifically define the term.)

So, Trump’s grand plan is to make the many Americans who aren’t in favor of socialism is to persuade voters and the media that he isn’t truly a socialist, that he’s just another “progressive,” and why should we fear his presidency?

Here’s the kicker: Sanders’ supporters call social security, Medicare and other War on Poverty and New Deal programs to be oh-so-good examples of socialism–and how can anyone be against them?–while saying that free college education for all, Medicare for all, forgiveness for all college loans  and all kinds of central government and economic schemes to be, well, just progressive.

I also suspect, Mr. President that you somehow managed to get rid of the term “liberal” as common usage and substitute “progressive.” Don’t know how you did it, but….

With Democrats running on a platform that requires investigations of this, that and everything else, they may demand a special counsel to investigate Trump’s collusion to install Bernie as his marshmellow-soft opponent in the 2020 election. So, be careful, Mr. President.

And who knows, maybe your collusion will backfire, and Bernie will beat you.

Disclosure: This column was planted by Pete Buttigieg. 

My historical novel: Madness: The War of 1812

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  • Trump is on record supporting a national stop and frisk program.

    Do you support it, Dennis?

  • In reply to Aquinas wired:

    A "national" stop and frisk program. No. I'd leave that to local communities to tailor as they deem is necessary. As an Aquinas fan, I assume that you've heard of the principle of subsidiarity.

  • In reply to Dennis Byrne:

    To be honest I had to look it up to refresh my memory. Do you suppose Trump obeys it?

  • In reply to Aquinas wired:

    Trump obeys only his gut instincts and his egomania. Yet, the idea of a federal government incorporates the idea of subsidiarity, more often recognized by conservatives than liberals.

  • While you allude to this only briefly in this article, I'd like to make a comment: I love it (sarcasm) when people who hate Christians, misrepresent early Christian Church history (probably through ignorance) and claim the early church community was socialistic.

    First off, the early church was not socialistic, and even if it was, they hate Christianity, so why would that be an argument for anything.

  • In reply to Rick Bohning:

    Read and reflect on Acts 2: 44-45 and Acts 4:34-37.

    BTW, were in the Gospels or Epistles does Jesus or the early Christians support capitalism?

  • In reply to Aquinas wired:

    You'll notice that the citations don't mention government. It's a voluntary community united, not under government control, by beliefs and common purpose. To suggest that this resembles anything like Sanders and his neosocialist advocate is, well, misguided.

  • In reply to Dennis Byrne:

    You are, as is said in logic, attacking a straw man. I never said the citations described a de facto government.

    But when a community unites with common beliefs and purpose it is making a social contract which in the opinion of many philosophers is the rudiments of a formal government.

    Fundamentally, the spirit behind the early Christian idea of social justice is at the heart of Bernie Sanders campaign. And recognizing this truth is not, as you say, misguided.

  • In reply to Aquinas wired:

    But the citations do refer to government. Jesus was not calling for a form of government--whether based on social justice or something else--as defined by Sanders or anyone else. Indeed, social justice is at the heart of Christianity and informs our fondest wish for government action. Yet, Jesus created a church, not a government. Suggesting that Jesus was calling for a certain kind of government is a stretch too far and twists His Good News into something unrecognizable.

  • I looked up the definition of socialism and read that it is a system of government where the government own the means of production. Since the first century church had no government and did not produce anything, I struggle to call it socialism.

    I'd call it charity. The idea of people giving from their abundance and blessing in order to help those in need has been a bedrock of of the Christian Church for millennia. In Acts 5, we see the story on Annanias and Sapphira, two people strongly condemned NOT for failing to share their wealth, but for lying about it. In their condemnation, Peter says, your land and money were yours to do with as you please.

    For me, a system where people are free to keeptgeir weath or free to give it to help others is not socialism, but charity. But, in all honesty, maybe those two terms are interchangable.

    As to your question...where does the New Testament condone Capitalism? It doesn't. Not does it condone socialism, not communism, not parlimentary monarchies, nor dictatorships, nor any form of human government. The form of government in effect at the time of writing of the New Testament was the Roman Empire and it spoke nothing to confirm nor rebuke that system.

    Because human institutions are not what the Bible is about. It isn't about us. It is about this thing called the Kingdom Of God.

    Are you a member of this Kingdom? If you were to die today, would God let you in?

  • Rick, let me address some of your points.

    The early Christian community must have produced something because Peter and the other disciples prescribed a sharing of "goods".

    As for Ananias and his complicit wife. A lesson for all liars, including the prolific one in the White House as I write.

    Jesus does say something about disproportionate wealth. Consider when Jesus drove the money changers from the Temple or when he compared a rich man getting into heaven to a camel fitting through the eye of a needle.

    Render to Caesar what is Caesar's and to God what is God's. He does indeed mention a human government specifically.

    Human institutions are composed of human beings. And who would claim that the Good News of Jesus was not for us, all humanity.

    We are all God's children. And God embraces us all. In life, and even in death.

  • In reply to Aquinas wired:

    A sharing of goods in the scriptures is not socialism. Jesus describes sharing as something based on love, charity and it is the result of free will. Sander's sharing--whether you call it socialism or not--is not the same. It is compulsory sharing, dictated by a dominant government. It is clearly not the kind of sharing that Jesus spoke motivated by true comparison and love.

  • In reply to Dennis Byrne:

    "Compulsory sharing"? Don't we call that taxation?

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