Dear Current Employeer: An Admission of Spring Break Defeat

Dear Current Employer,

You may have found it strange that I encouraged you to extended you weekend plans as we parted last week.  I had known you were going out of town and I was secretly hoping for you to stay as long as possible.  Please don’t take this wrong, I meant no disrespect.  It’s not that I don’t like working with you… quite the opposite in fact.

You may not realize, but I gave you  a heads up last week.  I hoped that you would read between the lines and understand my predicament of Spring Break.

For you, it is a time to travel and a much needed break, enjoying good food, good wine and even picking up a local show.  For me it is quite the opposite. My two sons, who, for all intents and purposes are like 12 year old twins, take a few precious moments in their own rooms playing computer games (like right now), otherwise they are engaged in a drag-out-brother-beat-down.

To keep them from body slamming each other on the couch, running through the house in a violent game of chase or rolling vigorously on the floor in a head lock, I have to find ways to entertain them.  This is not easy when I am trying to get work done.

I must admit that when you contacted me today to let me know you were going to be out of town for an extra day, I secretly rejoiced.  The weather has been typical Spring Break weather for Midwesterners… absolute shit.  Which means that the kids have treated  dog walks and bike rides like a chores, filled with the same whining and complaining that accompanies cleaning a toilet or hand washing dishes.

With that being said, we have been cooped up for the past three days and I am just about at my wits end.  To keep occupied and feel like a productive mother who engages her children with education and entertainment on days off, we baked.  And not just one recipe… four.  We made chocolate chip muffins, coconut macaroons, oatmeal cookies and banana bread.

And, like the good bakers that we are, we had to sample each item prior to baking as well as after.  We spent hours in the kitchen today, measuring ingredients, making messes, and licking spoons.  Not only am I keenly aware that I accomplished nothing that closely resembles work today, but I probably gained 5 pounds.

I must admit there are some fundamental concepts of Spring Break that I enjoy… I get to sleep in a little longer and I don’t have to make lunches.  But… THAT. IS. IT.

It’s only Monday night and I am already defeated by the week and what it has to bring.  If I work, I am ignoring them and essentially every item of furniture in my home that may get destroyed by their inevitable “horse play”.  If I pay attention and strive to be the mothers in the parenting magazines that I strive to be, I will end up with a kitchen full of baked goods, empty cupboards and the inability to get my jeans past my hips by Friday.

So, in closing I am asking for your forgiveness in advance. There will be very little I accomplish this week and I know that will be frustrating.  Believe me, I know this for sure.  Spring Break is only a taste of what Summer Break will be like.  I am, in no way, looking forward to three months of this type of chaos.

(I now understand why they advertise summer camps the week after Spring Break… it is probably their height of enrollment, and understandably so.)

If you have any sense of empathy and can remember what it was like to have young children, I implore your understanding.  I beg for any helpful advice and, most importantly, I ask for your choice in cookie.  I can only hope that a tin of our afternoon baking will soften your heart.


Your Humble Employee- Defeated by Spring Break,




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