Category: Holidays

Eight Reasons Why Hanukkah Annoys Me

Hanukkah is the Festival of Lights and Feast of Dedication. As a father who is responsible for human lives, it is also a reminder that I am getting older and more and more invisible by the second. During my lifetime, I have watched Hanukkah evolve from a cherished holiday to a cumbersome and burdensome week-plus... Read more »

For Father's Day I Want Cool Presents

I’m pushing 40, and I still love getting presents, especially ones that come wrapped in boxes. Presents are mysterious and awesome. I possess the same child-like excitement (and penis size) today when I open a present as I did when I was a youngster. I’m also happy to accept presents in the form of cash,... Read more »

We Celebrate Passover By Eating What We Want

I like being a Jew, and one of the biggest reasons is because I can choose which traditions I want to follow. I observe Judaism through family gatherings, cultural identity, anxiety and neuroses. I was in a Jewish fraternity, I married a Jew under a chuppah, and we have a mezuzah on our door more... Read more »
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    Chocolate Diapers

    I am a vitamin D-deficient former Floridian--who, despite the winter--loves Chicago. I contradicted convention (and common sense) by moving FROM the beach to the Midwest, but Lou Malnati's and any Italian beef sandwich reinforce that I made the right decision. I also got a wife and two sons out of it, and I would do anything for my family, except miss a Miami Hurricanes football game. This is my take on fatherhood. You can contact me at Thank you for reading!

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