Even though Chicago was not chosen to host the Olympics, the city continues to obsess over the games. Every Twitter feed, Facebook page and phone app is dedicated to divulging any and all Olympic details. Is this mania just simple country pride, or is it something more?
Here are 5 surefire ways to know if you are too obsessed with the Olympics.
1. You narrate your thoughts like an announcer:
If this is your inner dialogue at work you could be in trouble, “… Desk is clean… that’s a good sign… She lands perfectly in her chair..Kujava’s got this… Opens the e-mail… this is it… the big one… Oh GOD NO! An E-mail from her ex…. This is gonna cost her at least a point deduction.”
2. You turn everything into a competition:
You can no longer walk leisurely down Michigan Av., because you can’t fight the temptation to race the people nearby. If somebody tosses their used Kleenex in the garbage, your Kleenex will be more used and be tossed from a greater distance and a more difficult angle.
3. You start ranking everything on a scale of 1-10:
It is impossible to pass a parked car without ranking their park job. You examine the park based on the difficulty level and the precision of the park. the left sided parallel between two dump trucks is impressive… but he could be closer to the curb… and more centered.. I’d say a 7.34!
4. Your closet looks like the American flag:
Red white and blue line your closet…in that order. To line it blue, white, red would be treason and you would subsequently need to move to France… or Canada where those things don’t matter.
5. You conduct an opening ceremony for everything:
If you need to take a coffee break at work, a dance must be performed and music that originates from the coffee bean’s country of origin must be played. Colombian blend coffee on special… dance to this.