It’s 9:30 am on what we call Boxing Day, but what apparently this side of the Atlantic is just called ‘the day after Christmas’. That said, I’m not quite sure if I’m in some kind of a time warp, and it’s actually the night before Christmas because all through our house, not a creature is stirring, not even a mouse. Or the dog. So I’ve run a few checks and yes, I know Christmas is over because….
1. This is the first morning I’ve sat at the computer and not been frantically looking for a present for someone.
2. The kitchen smells of turkey fat, mainly because it was the youth’s job to clean the stove top last night.
3. The first task of the day is to find the sales receipts for all the presents that are being exchanged.
4. There are solitary half-empty glasses scattered all over the house. And they don’t contain water.
5. The dog turns his nose up at dog food a) because he’s been fed delicious scraps the day before and b) because he knows there’s plenty more where that came from.
6. There’s an alien tin-foil monster in the fridge. And no more milk. And a very strange mixture of smells because you got the brussel sprouts to potato ratio wrong again.
7. Your dishwasher (human or mechanical) is either backed up or has packed up.
8. There are USB charging leads everywhere you turn. And paper hats.
9. You no longer feel an urgent need to water the Christmas tree or brush up the ever-increasing pile of needles.
10. And the clearest sign of all – the recycling bin is suddenly overflowing with broken-down cardboard boxes that until yesterday were hiding the actual boxes the presents were in. Which are also now in there.
So yup, happy de-Boxing Day everyone.