Loving your saggy self!

I am thinking of letting it go. Oh, I know you all are thinking, “Oh she is so emotional.” But you’re wrong!

I am not talking about letting go of emotional baggage. I am talking about the work involved in beautifying myself.

I am sick to death of the time it takes to be a little attractive. I mean to be “not scary” it takes at leat 30 minutes. But to be cute, take’s an hour at least.

Have you ever noticed the amount of stuff you have in your cabinets dedicated to cuteness?

There are products for everything! Moisturizing lotions with ribbons for wrinkles, some with beads to get rid of dead skin. There are body shapers and waist cinchers. Things to lift your butt or and special bras to enhance your chest. Makeup to hide your bags. Eye shadow to make your eyes bigger, more smokey and bedroom like.

Hair extensions to make short hair longer. Battery operated face scrubbers to make your skin smooth like a babies butt! Tools to make hair curly, straight and fuller.

And lets not even start on the hair removal products. I have been sucked into more infomercials about ways to get rid of unwanted hair…

I say, ladies, let’s take a stand! Let it grow out. If it’s frizzy, embrace it! Love your saggy butt! Forget smoothing out wrinkles, name them! Keep the dead skin- you could use it as a DNA sample if you are ever kidnapped.

Stop lifting and sucking things. Let it out, you need to breathe.

Think of your spare tire as an emergency flotation device.

I love muffins so why not love a muffin top? Think about it ladies, this could possibly save you hundreds of hours of time!

But, hey, let me know how this works for you, because I am too much of a chicken to see the “real” me. But feel free to discover the “real” you. And let me know how it goes.

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