A Jewish Perspective of the Human Condition

A Jewish Perspective of the Human Condition

This is an old and a-bit-too-long joke that subtly highlights qualities that have enabled Jews to survive into the 21st Century: Wisdom, wit, patience and a finely honed sense of irony.

Abe and Sarah had been married for 40 years, but Abe’s tepid performance in the boudoir had been putting Sarah’s boots to sleep.

After much cajoling, Abe finally agreed to visit their rabbi, who gave them his undivided attention. Nodding sympathetically, the rabbi stroked his beard and said, “I’ve got an idea, Abe, you willing to give it a try?”

“Anything, rabbi. Tell me what to do?”

“By any chance do you happen to have a young, male neighbor?” the rabbi asked. “A nice, strong, strapping boy?”

Sarah jumped up and said, “Yes we do. The boy next door is about 22 and he mows the lawn every Tuesday, wearing only jeans and no shirt.”

“Perfect,” said the rabbi. “Abe, you need to talk to the this boy, offer him a few dollars if necessary. Have him stand next to the bed while you and Sarah are making love.”

Before Abe could voice his shock, the rabbi continued, “It is of vital importance that he swing a towel over his head while you are making love.”

The rabbi took a napkin off his desk and demonstrated, swinging the napkin over his head in a circular motion.

Reluctantly, Abe agreed and, when Sarah informed him on Tuesday that the neighbor boy was mowing the lawn, he went out to talk to him.

Abe gave it his best, trying desperately to ignore the young man standing next to the bed, waving a towel. Sarah, however was not moved.

Abe paid the boy and sullenly stormed downstairs to watch the Cubs game on TV.

When Abe and Sarah returned to the rabbi’s office to report on their experiment, the rabbi nodded in silence and stroked his beard thoughtfully.

“This is going to sound crazy,” said the rabbi, “but I think you need to try it again.”

“I don’t know rabbi. It didn’t work very well last time.”

“This time,” the rabbi continues, “you must switch places with the neighbor boy. You need to be the one swinging the towel.”

Abe thought for a minute and then said, “Well, we’ve come this far. I might as well try it.”

The following Tuesday, Abe again spoke with the shirtless young man, but had to offer him a little extra cash once he explained the program.

As the young man began making love to Sarah, Abe stood at the end of the bed swinging that towel with all his might. He was amazed at the way Sarah responded, moaning and writhing, screaming as she climaxed in ecstasy.

When they were done, the young man rolled over on his back and closed his eyes.

Abe poked him in his shoulder and when the young man opened his eyes, Abe wagged a finger in his face and said loudly, “See? That’s how you swing a towel.”

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Filed under: Humor, Satire

Tags: How To Swing A Towel

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