I hate dining out with my kid more than you do

I hate dining out with my kid more than you do

I see you.

Staring at me from across the room.

Across the table.

Making eyes at me. At him. Snickering under your breath. Chuckling with your friends. Whispering to your partner.


I see it.

I see it all.

I’m going to let you in on a little secret.

I hate dining out with my kid more than you do.

Ask anyone.

Toddlers and restaurants don’t mix. No matter how hard we try as parents, most toddlers just cannot handle a 3 course meal.

They are bored.

Belted into a chair for an hour or more. Their little minds going a mile minute while the adults attempt conversation. Longing to get out and run. Yell. Play. Make loud noises.

It’s maddening to them.

Sure there are coloring books and crayons. Goldfish and fruit snacks. Sometimes we even break out the big guns and offer our phone or tablet. But no matter how well behaved a child is at home, restaurants make them lose their fucking minds.

So, I see you. I see you there. But, do you see me?


Struggling to entertain him.

Struggling to keep him quiet so that you can enjoy your meal.

Struggling to eat a meal that doesn’t end up cold and wrapped to go.

Struggling to take part in adult conversation instead of toddler jibberish.

Struggling to enjoy myself for just a brief moment. A moment that I rarely get a chance to have anymore.

Struggling to not lose my mind.

I bet you don’t. You just see him.

The brat. The bad kid.

Well, fuck off.

I hate dining with my kid more than you do.


Did you enjoy this post? Check out 9 New Years Resolutions I wish my toddler made.


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