If My 8 Month Old Son Could Tweet.....

If My 8 Month Old Son Could Tweet.....

When I was pregnant with my son I honestly didn’t believe people when they told me that once the baby arrived time would fly by. One minute they are tiny helpless newborns and the next walking, talking toddlers. I wish I would have listened. Granted, we have been with our son every step of the way, but these past 8 months have certainly flown by.

He is such an intelligent little man.  His first word was “hi”…more like “hiiiiiiiiiiiiiii”. He claps his hands when we say “yeah!”, and he shakes his head “no” when we say “no”. (have I mentioned how f-ing fabulous THAT is?) He loves to dance to the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse songs.  He loves our three dogs and our cat. He plays with his toys and is a minute away from a full on sprint crawl. What amazes me most is how much he loves the IPad and our cell phones and not just to put in his mouth.

He knows that music and baby apps come from the devices. He knows that when he is in his bouncy acting a fool, mommy puts on Little Einsteins and he bounces to the music and flies like Rocket. He knows that his grandmas are in a little application called Skype. When he sees either device his eyes light up and the verbal begging begins. So, we bought him a Fisher-Price Laugh and Learn Smart Phone.  Needless to say, it isn’t the same at all as our technological advanced phones but watching his mind work is so amazing.

As he sits on the floor, typing away on his phone, I imagine he is updating his status. If my 8 month old  son could Tweet, this is what it would say:

  •  I like formula but where are the #boobies #nofair
  •  It’s about time you got me out of the infant carrier #over22pounds #DUH #lazyasses
  •  I’m tired of the little punk ass at daycare who keeps hitting me #gameon #who’scryingnow #justbringit #brahmabull
  •  Drove shotgun at the grocery store today. #speedracer #helloladies #cartstastegood
  •  In a big boy car seat now…still facing backwards. #epicfail #FML #WTF
  •  I enjoy shitting myself every night. #uptheback #loadsoflaundry #shittyballs
  • My mom is hot..mess that is. #hotmess #hormonal #ididthis #daddyisstupidsometimes
  • My mouth hurts like a mo-fo! #teething #whatareteeth  #drooling #orajeljunkie #where’sthewhiskey
  •  I’m just days away from crawling #yourlifeisover #herecomestrouble #screwbabygates
  •  Baby Mum-Mum Cookies….#enoughsaid #youeatthem #wasteofair #seriously #OREOS
  •  Mommy calls it a “pee-pee”. I call it  #fun #mydingaling #hoursofentertainment


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