Are they all.....yours??

Every now and then I come across a person that feels they need to know everything and anything about how I “ended up with” four kids.  I laugh a lot.  If I don’t laugh, I think I might punch the person for asking such questions.

I know that there are times when you just want to make small talk with someone, that’s totally fine, but when you are just prying because you want to be nosey – well – that’s different.

I was at Target for the 100th time this past week (and really, who doesn’t love a good Target shopping trip?) and I had all the kids with me.  They are usually pretty good with us in stores and today wasn’t any different.  We are casually walking down the main aisle and my 5 year old son asked if they can pick out of movie.  I said that was fine but they all had to agree on the movie or it was going to be a no.   I get a tap on my shoulder and turn around to find a woman staring blankly at me.

Me:  “Can I help you?”

Her: (still staring) “Ummmm…I was just…..wondering….if….they….were….all….yours.”

Me: (WTF???)  (I laugh) “Yes, they are all mine – did one of them do something wrong?”

Her: “Oh no, no, not at all!!!  I was just wondering how someone can have so many kids.”

Me: (So many kids???  Do I LOOK like Kate Gosselin???)  “I actually do not think that is any of your business and for you to stop and ask me and interfere with MY shopping is really rude.”

She walks off.

(I normally would have used a few choice swear words but my 3 year old has now started saying “Damn it!” and “Son of a Bitch!” EACH IN THE CORRECT CONTEXT so I withheld.)

I ponder all of this in the checkout line.  Why do people do this?  I categorize this under the other questions that you just don’t ask another woman/mother – like “Are you having anymore?” “Are you hoping for a boy next?” “Are you ever going to have kids?” “Isn’t four (or whatever number of children) enough?”

I finish checking out and we are heading to the car and I hear someone say, “Excuse me, can I ask a question?”

(Ummmmm…am I on a fucking Candid Camera right now?  What is with all the freaking questions today???)

I turn around and it’s a woman (looking to be about mid to late 40’s?) and she says, “Oh!!  I was looking for your Mom!  I was going to ask her about how she likes driving this car.  Is she still in the store?”


For the record, I’m 36.  Damn old enough to have children.

I reply, “No, (laughing) I am the Mom and this is my car.  What can I help you with?”

She stares at me blankly and walks off.  (And the only thing I can come up with about why she walked away is that she was embarrassed. )

I spent the next ten minutes just sitting in the car wondering where the camera was hiding and just shaking my head and laughing.  Looking forward to the next trip to Target!


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