Usually, I’m cool and sophisticated. Okay, I was cool and sophisticated one time, many years ago. Actually, I’m a dork. I was reminded of that yesterday (as I am frequently), when I took my car in to have a flat tire repaired. The guy at the counter asked for my keys, and I took my house key off the ring and gave it to him.
He said, “I really don’t know you that well.”
I couldn’t wait to post that on Facebook, because I own my dorkiness. One of my fellow bloggers, Howard Moore at I’ve Got the Hippy Shakes, tells me that folks reading my blog would never guess how funny I am. So, I thought I’d share some of my embarrassing moments. Laughing is good for your health, and laughing at yourself is good for your soul.
Here are my top 5 dorky moments.
1. About 6 months after being diagnosed with cancer and going to dozens of doctors’ appointments, I got a little bit too comfortable with taking off my clothes. I had to have an x-ray of my leg, and I walked into the room with the x-ray technician and immediately took off my pants. Her eyes got very big, and she said, “No, don’t do that. You don’t need to take off your clothes for this.” There really is nothing to do except pull up your pants and laugh.
2. I was working with a graduate student who was having trouble with one of his students. I agreed to stop by during a scheduled conference to meet the troubled student and see if I could help. I went to the grad student’s office, walked straight up to the grad student and introduced myself. “Hello. I’m Dr. Kerri Morris.” I introduced myself to the one person in the room who already knew who I was. I will never forget the look on that grad student’s face. Wide eyes, incredulity.
3. When I first started teaching, I wore lots of long, swirly skirts. One day in class, I put my knee on a chair during a class discussion. When I put my knee down to walk across the room, the heel of my pump caught the hem of the skirt. It had an elastic waist and was pulled down to my hips. Thank god I was wearing a slip.
4. I was traveling with a co-worker to a conference in the early 80s, and I was very excited to be flying. It felt very grown up. The old headphones on planes, if you’ll remember, were a Y shape. You were meant to have to slide the headphones on like a stethoscope. But, I, of course, put them on with the cord coming out of the top of my head. The woman I was traveling with looked at me with disgust, grabbed the top of the headphones and pulled them down the right way. She saw nothing at all amusing about my dorkiness, bit I still giggle about how much it embarrassed her.
5. One summer in college I went for a job interview for New Mexico magazine. My dad knew the editor, and he walked me to his office because they worked in the same building. After the interview, my dad was waiting for me outside the room. The guy who was interviewing me shook my hand and said, “Kerri, thank you so much for coming by.” I said, “Ho, Ho.” I have no idea why those words came out of my mouth, and neither did my dad or my interviewer. The silence was long and awkward. I did not get the job.
I’m proud to be a card carrying member of “Dorks in Public.” When in doubt, laugh.
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