Painting the Beauty of Life: Interview with Single French Canadian Mom Paméla Desrosiers

For the month of May, I want to feature 31 women who continue to touch my life through their kindness, friendship, humor, passion, and determination. Each of these women have some great secrets as they open their doors and let me into their “mommy world”. Their stories bring us back to the realization that we all go through struggles, make mistakes, and sometimes need to “fake it until we make it” as parents. Join us as we celebrate these mothers throughout the month of May.

Welcome to day 22 of Bulldog’s Mommy Blog Project! Today we get to feature Paméla Desrosiers, a single mom who understands the challenges of doing it all and being a good role model for her daughter. Before we learn more about this artistic mother, let’s learn about the parenting tip of the day.

Parenting Tip of the Day: Always keep learning and creating! With the daily hustle and bustle we often forget to read, write, play music, act, paint, and use our creativity. If we want our kids to develop more in the arts we need to do the same. Find your artistic talent and practice it. For me, it is writing. I spend 15 minutes a day journaling. I have 2 journals. I started a journal to my husband that documents my daily stress, appreciation for him, and my dreams. It is less weird for me to journal to him than to myself. Every year on Valentine’s Day, we exchange journals and read what we wrote to each other. I have another journal where I write down my aspirations, dreams, goals, fears, and insecurities. Just writing it down helps. From many of those journal entries, I get inspiration for my blog posts. Just pick one artistic thing and practice it 10-15 minutes once a day. Make it a habit and soon enough you will find more time and energy to do the stuff you love. You will rediscover that passion you once lost.

For more info or tips click on our website: Parent Coaching

Paméla and I go WAY back. We grew up in a small town outside of Montreal: the type of town with less than 5 stoplights, one grocery store, and lots of small town gossip. I never felt like I fit in. To be honest, I never did. I was different, but I always looked up to Paméla. She was so artistic, unique, and proud to be different. She didn’t fit the small town mold and she knew that bigger things were awaiting her. I found her on Facebook years later and we reconnected (what would we ever do without Facebook!?!). I soon found out that she was a successful artist, single mom, teacher, and a grad student. I admired how she juggled it all and still had time to fulfill her artistic dreams. Paméla taught me to be proud of being different and to shout it out loud. She brings beauty to the world.

Please welcome the talented, beautiful, multi-tasking Paméla Desrosiers to our Mommy Blog Project!

 

Paméla Desrosiers profile pic

Name: Paméla Desrosiers
Location: Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Mommy Title: The “Multi-Tasker” Mommy: Student in Art Education, Small Business Instructor, and Artist at the Pinkpam Project.
Favorite Social Media Site: Facebook
Mommy Status: Single
Number of kids: 1
Age: 9
Gender: Girl

Walk me through a day in your household.
First thing I do in the morning is prepare breakfast. By 7:30am, I get my daughter dressed so she can get ready for school. She eats breakfast, and she gets to watch some TV while I prepare her lunch. I drop her off at school since it is right around the corner. Then, I get home and my days vary. Everyday is different, I have a task list and I try to do the most that I can. That is the way I get organized. There is always a lot of laundry and I don’t have a dryer. So, often as I am working on my canvas, clothes are hanging all over. Or I might be running out the door to teach or go to school. You know, I have to do everything as a single mom. So when my work is done, I pick her up from school and I start dinner. Then we do homework. It takes forever. My daughter has ADHD and she struggles with homework. I try so hard with her. It is a struggle so after homework, we take some time to play. I like to reward her for all her efforts. We then read, do bath time, and head to bed. The bedtime routine can take a long time too. She will resist going to bed. It starts out with, “I need water.” And, “I need to go pee….”, you name it, and she’s tried it as an excuse to not go to bed. Then I work until about 12am-1am. Like I said, my days vary and it is really hard to explain: I am ALL over the place. Like now, I am painting, fixing this bike, doing laundry, cleaning, and (haha) talking to you.

Paméla Desrosiers

What is your favorite room in the house and why? 
I love my living room because everything is in it. It contains my office, my kitchen, my laundry rack, and the sofa.

What is your favorite time of the day with your kids?
Before bed we take 20 minutes to cool down and talk about the day. When my daughter talks about her day, I can help her through any struggles. I make sure we talk about it so she can let it go and feel heard.  I don’t talk about negative things and try to find out what was fun and what she liked. After the struggle with homework, I want to end on a positive note. I want her to feel good and have a good night sleep.

What is a unique family tradition?
My daughter likes to build things and I encourage her to be creative. Now she is starting to create stuff on her own and it is becoming our thing. I enjoy watching her use her imagination and create art. I teach her how to make sculptures by using play-doh. She is tactile and I want her to develop more so she has an outlet for her energy and so she can focus on creating beautiful things.

What do you do when you are overwhelmed?
I talk to my boyfriend and/ or I call my mom. I need to “evacuate” sometimes, so I go out and usually grab a coffee. As a teenager, I had a love/ hate relationship with my mom, as many girls do. But now she is my rock, she is my support, and I love her for all that she has done to raise me. It is a tough job to be a mom. I realize this now.

What is the best “uh-oh” story?
I had just moved into our apartment and sometimes in Montreal the windows are not childproof. So, I went around the apartment and locked all the windows. That night, I was working in the living room. I got this overwhelming feeling, like an angel came to me and was telling me to check on my daughter. I ran into her room and my heart stopped. She was hanging out of the window. Half of her body was outside! I quickly grabbed her and realized that the lock was broken. It was the scariest moment of my life and I am grateful that I felt something was wrong. I had a little angel looking over me.

Broadway Opening Of 'Lestat' - Arrivals Which celebrity mom is most like you and why?
I love Rosie O’Donnell! I am impressed with people that have more than two kids. I am in awe of Rosie. The way she manages a career and kids is amazing. Look at me: I have difficulty managing just ONE kid.

What is your favorite website or blog?
I don’t follow a lot of blogs because I don’t have a lot of time to read. But, I make time to read these ones:

  • I like Marianne Prairie. This mommy blogger and author is funny and pretty informative.
  • I also like ADDitude for parents. It has a lot of information and resources about ADD.
  • The new Mommy TLC blog is also great. I have 3-4 friends that write for the blog and love to catch up on the material.

What advice would you give your younger self?
Calm down and take your time. I was a little bit “stuck” in my head before I had my daughter. My daughter saved my life. “Faire confidence a la vie!”: Life will give you everything you need when the time is right. I was really stressed out in my past. I just needed to believe that life would take care of me and point me in the direction where I needed to go.

What is your go to outfit?
Leggings, a black shirt, and a big scarf. All a girl really needs is a BIG scarf. It spices up any outfit!

What is something you are pretending to know about but have no clue?
I don’t know, that is a hard question. I might say accounting. I have to teach accounting to small business owners. I don’t have a choice; I need to get them to understand the content and it is part of the curriculum for the classes I teach. I really try to simplify it (for my sake too).

What have you learned from your kids?
Simplicity! You can’t control anything. Let it go! Our kids are gifts and they are not our property. They have their own lives to live. Sometimes, my daughter is not just my child: she is her own person and she has her own life. It is hard to accept that at times. It’s amazing how hard it is to just let go. I just want to protect her from the world and take away her pain. When she struggles, it is so hard and she needs to learn how to use social skill tools. I just can’t take care of it for her. I need to teach her the tools so she can succeed in life. They are hard to learn.

If you could ask the universe one question what would it be?
I think I am really curious about my daughter’s future. Will she be ok?

What is the looming task on your to do list?
Building my website for my company Pinkpam. It is important and my website is currently under construction. I sell most of my artwork via Facebook, but, truly, I need to get that done.

Closing thoughts, mantra, or advice:
I think the best advice comes before joining the motherhood club. If you choose a partner, choose someone that really helps and supports you in all your projects. A partner who is there for you. Test him/ her as well as test yourself in that relationship. Make sure you are really ready for that future commitment. For motherhood, do your best and don’t regret it. Your kids will always have something to say or challenge you. If you are doing the best you can, then let go of the guilt. In the end, our kids will know we did our best. We can’t do everything and know everything.

I would like to thank Paméla Desrosiers for her heartfelt interview. She touched me by how much patience and time she devotes to her daughter to ensure she learns and grows. Her advice makes you think deeply and I found myself eagerly nodding away as she spoke to me. She has a way of welcoming you into her artistic chaos and you feel like you are part of her world. She is honest and real. Paméla, I am proud of all you achieved and how you overcame your challenges. You taught me to just be myself and be proud!

To learn more about Paméla Desrosiers’ art work click on her Facebook page. Her art is RAW, filled with emotions and beauty. Every piece has a story. It’s amazing! Be sure to take a look at Pinkpam or contact Paméla at pam@pinkpam.com

Until Next Time…
Kortney Peagram
Be Strong*Be Brave*Be a Bulldog

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Filed under: Mommy Blog Project

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