2010's Crazy Super Bowl Props
Well it's that time of year again, when degenerate gamblers come out of the woodwork to bet on pretty much anything related to the NFL's big game.
Oh, you thought it was only about who wins or the point spread? You're probably still under the impression that betting on which player will score first or the over/under on the jersey number of the guy who scores last are edgy bets.
No, no, no my friend, let me enlighten you on the world of crazy Super Bowl prop bets with ten of this year's best.
Note: You'll notice that the majority of the "craziest prop bets" come from one site, Bodog. Bodog as of late has become the online prop betting Mecca and is one of the few sites that still panders to the extreme prop bet. It's not that I'm trying to favor Bodog, it's just...geez...look what you can lose money on!
In this gallery
Who? Sportsbook.com apparently decided to have a bit fun with Colts backup tight end—yes I had to look up who he played for…and what his position was—this year and list a reception bet as if he was…errr…playing. The over/under is listed at .5, and yes if Gijon grabs no receptions it counts as under. So considering Robinson was blanked in ten games during the regular season, I’d take the under. On a somewhat related side note, is it just me or does Gijon sound like some sort of Godzilla-esque Japanese movie monster? 
At first glance this doesn’t seem to be that ridiculous of a bet—okay, it’s ridiculous but considering some of these other money wasters it almost seems legit. Curiously, however, Sportsbet.com gives a higher payout to “wide left” than “wide right.” I haven’t done the research but it seems to me Scott Norwood must have been favored to slice that ball right in Super Bowl XXV, because come on, he was going to miss…
This is a fairly common bet nowadays and pretty much every sportsbook that offers props also offers a coin toss bet, usually with a five percent juice. BetUs.com took the coin toss bet to a new level this year, however, and actually published an expert analyst article breaking down the strategy in picking the coin toss—um, I’m pretty sure it’s a 50-50 shot BetUS, no further research required. Lo and behold, the article stated that in the 43 year history of the Super Bowl the opening coin toss has landed on heads 22 times and tails 21, making it an almost exact 50-50. Interestingly enough, however, the article also found that the NFC has won the last 14 coin tosses, for a 29-14 advantage all-time. So I guess if you’re going to make an opening coin toss bet look to put your money on the Saints. 
This is one of my favorite types of sports wager, the cross book. And this year Sportbook.com came up with some dooseys. Will Notre Dame forward Luke Harangody’s points plus rebounds in this Sunday’s game be more than the total amount of yards of the first made field goal? Will Penguins star Sidney Crosby have more points this weekend than Drew Brees has interceptions? I mean who comes up with this stuff? My favorite is who will have more points in their respective games, Celtics center Kendrick Perkins or Colts kicker Matt Stover? That’s 280 pound, 6’10” Perkins vs. 42 year-old, 5’11” Stover--Perkins’s got him by almost a full foot! Perkins is favored by 2.5, but I don’t know, mighty leg has some fight in him, he might be the pick.
This is a tough one. You’d think a Saint’s victory would be more marketable than an Indianapolis one, but, of course, Peyton Manning is the most marketable player in the NFL. Ugh, Bodog.com, you’ve really got me here! I guess I’d go with the favorite, which Bodog says is the market will go up with a Colts win. Not sure how they came up with that, but whatever, money’s down. 
Another Bodog head scratcher, all I can say is I really hope it’s not Two and a Half Men—I hate that show and I don’t get America’s love affair with it. I think it’s much more likely we’ll see some promos for CBS’s new show Undercover Boss, going off at 1-2 on Bodog. I think Undercover Boss is made an even stronger horse in this bet by the fact that it runs immediately following the game, so you know there will be at least a few throwaways to the show during the broadcast in order to get some people to stay tuned. People won’t, but CBS has to at least try, right? 
This year you knew someone had to list this one, and that someone ended up being, of course, Bodog. I really don’t want breakdown a strategy in betting on this, but if you really want my take I guess I can see the announcers getting kind of carried away with referring to Katrina if the game gets out of hand or the Saints are mounting some sort of epic comeback. Remember it only counts if the announcers say “Hurricane Katrina,” simply “Katrina” doesn’t cut it, and neither does a sideline reporter referring to the disaster. Anyway, the line is 2.5 and I’d take the over…and feel sick about it afterward.
For a far lighter bet on this year’s game why not try another Bodog wager, betting on the color top Kim Kardashian will wear at this year’s Super Bowl? For those of you who are unaware, Kardashian is the girlfriend of Saints running back Reggie Bush and, therefore, will be attending the game. Bodog lists your options for this one as being white, black or any other color, and a quick Google image search of Kardashian makes me think “any other color” is your best bet…to bad Kardashian’s skin color isn’t an option; Google image says that’s the winner. 
Bodog lists your options for this one as being God, family, teammates , coach, or no one. I think most gamblers will be attracted at first to “God”—never thought I’d say that—but this is a mistake. If you notice players tend to thank God last, reserving recognition of the Big Guy for their final, “enthralling” statement. No, I think the best move is teammates, then family, then God. The coach rarely gets thanked, so that’s a throwaway bet, and if your betting “no one” then you believe in a selfish sporting world, where athletes constantly whine about their playing time and rarely focus on the team…and nothing like that ever happens, right? 
My roommate, Goose, pointed this one out to me. How awesome is this? Bodog thank you so much for listing such a mind twistingly awesome wager! It’s the kind of bet that will force gamblers to review far too much Gatorade dumping footage from the Saints and Colts this season—can’t you just see the Youtube searches? “Saints Preseason Victory,” so great! It’s an instant classic and hopefully will join the coin toss bet as a standard Super Bowl prop. My choice: yellow. Thinking back on it I can only remember a handful of times that Gatorade Yellow wasn’t the liquid of choice for dousing a victorious coach with. I wonder what that says about the other Gatorade flavors? “Drink Gatorade Yellow or Lose.”
10) Total Receiving Yards on Gijon Robinson’s First Reception
Who? Sportsbook.com apparently decided to have a bit fun with Colts backup tight end—yes I had to look up who he played for…and what his position was—this year and list a reception bet as if he was…errr…playing. The over/under is listed at .5, and yes if Gijon grabs no receptions it counts as under. So considering Robinson was blanked in ten games during the regular season, I’d take the under. On a somewhat related side note, is it just me or does Gijon sound like some sort of Godzilla-esque Japanese movie monster?
4 Comments
DrexxMac said:
Hey, "props" on finding that gatorade picture man, that was gold.
Also, do you and the Goose want to have a "Who can win the most crazy super bowl props?" prop? Let me know!
Chasse Rehwinkel said:
I know goose is looking to do that with his column this week so I don't think so but he's doing some interesting research into the Gatorade one, so check that out.
Goose said:
Hold your horses there Rounder! You saying that the Goose isn't down for some absolutely ridiculous bets? Come on now, this is the guy who proposed bets on Shaq Vs. Let's hammer out the details, I'm in.
Tory said:
You guys have some serious problems...
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