Archive for December 2013
Chain letters suck ass and should be illegal
Awwww shit, you’re not gonna believe what my daughter got the other day. Nahh, not her period. That would have sent me to an early grave. Or a giant handle of vodka. Although I hear kids are getting that shit at like negative-2-years-old these days with all that hormone milk they’re drinking. But I digress.... Read more »
Santa Claus ain't comin' to your town, Shlomo Baruch
So this is the conversation I had with my daughter last week. KID: How big are the elves? ME: Uhh, I don’t know, like the size of your Barbies. KID: What does Santa do if his sleigh breaks? ME: No F’ing clue. KID: Does he have a mommy? ME: No. KID: Santa doesn’t have a... Read more »
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Meet The Blogger

Karen Alpert
Karen is the ridiculously hairy, self-deprecating writer of the blog Baby Sideburns. She has spent the past fifteen years working for national advertising agencies until she was promoted to her newest favorite job— Mommy. She lives with her two amazing kiddos and a very forgiving husband who is kind enough not to call her Cousin It when she undresses for bed every night.
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