NEANDERTHAL THINKING; THE REPUBLICANS’ EMBARRASSING CONTRADICTION It wasn’t all that long ago that a group of the leading Republican presidential aspirants declaimed–in answer to a reporter’s question–that they did not believe in evolution. Every single one of them! In lurching to the defense of a hominid species extinct for about 40,000 years, beauty-contest winner Tennessee... Read more »

IMAGINARY TRUMP BIOGRAPHIES BY FAMOUS WRITERS

Last night, after a scan of the listings, I decided there was nothing on TV worth watching. So I decided instead to conjure a cadre of notable literary figures–living and dead– to ask them the following question: If the gods of letters charged you with the task of writing Donald Trump’s biography, what would the... Read more »

The New GOP Congressional Internship Application Form

My usual unreliable sources here at Faque News Central report that they have recently received a document purported to be a Congressional Internship Application Form purportedly developed by purported members of Congress Gaetz and Green, and a certain D. Trump, who purportedly claims US. citizenship Following is the document outlining the criteria for internship eligibility.... Read more »
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The Future of American Science Leadership Comes in New Shades, New Shapes

I’m sitting at my desk right now, eyes fastened on a magazine page lying next to my keyboard. The page belongs to a recent issue of Science News. Distributed evenly are squares framing the photographic portraits of forty young faces, in much the manner of high-school graduation yearbooks. Indeed, the faces belong to high school... Read more »

Why It's Time For a New "Chicago" Song

Any time any of the two most celebrated songs about our fair city, Chicago, My Kind of Town or Chicago, That Toddlin’ Town storm my acoustic turf, I marvel not at why they are regarded as beloved, but rather as misbegotten. Apart from compositions afflicted by melodies that wobble about lost and dazed in that... Read more »

A Short Catalog of Tagline ADrocities

On those occasions in which some circumstance wedges me into an exchange with someone who knows nothing about me. the stranger–with the ineluctability of sundown–will engage in the short-cut question that practically all Americans intone, the one that will size me up to determine whether or not I carry enough status to make me worthwhile... Read more »
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One Man's Plan for Balanced Education in America?

The man with the plan isn’t me. It’s my former bother–er, brother-in-law Ace, who–just because he keeps texting me– thinks he’s maintained a friendship with me. .Anyway, Ace keeps nagging me about my supposed political bias, a topic which–in this, my blog–I dilate on from time to time. He keeps badgering me about –in the... Read more »

To those who still cling onto the Big Lie

In case you forgot, the seed of insurrection was first planted by the contention that individual voter fraud was rampant. Despite the evidence that this was is preposterous fairy tale, millions of you persisted in your immutable delusion. Since unassailable data can’t budge you from your purblind faith, I’ve decided to invoke a suggestion that... Read more »

Swifties Redux

In 1910, printer Victor Appleton launched the first in the series of Tom Swift books of fiction aimed at boys enchanted by science and technology. By the millions, readers worldwide were lavish in their celebration. Cultivated critics were not. Largely owing to the author’s (or authors’) adverbial promiscuity, the literary luster was destined to dim.... Read more »
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Why Have Fox Pundits Turned Against Free Enterprise?

I, myself, I don’t care much one way or another what goes on at Fox. But my Weekly-Standard devotee, Uncle Mel? Boy, is he steamed. So I’ve allowed him to express his vexation on my blog. So here’s Mel: What’s all this tosh about “cancel culture,” you schmucks? We all know it’s just code for... Read more »